The World Inside Our Dreams: Book One

In Hye

I looked up at the skies one last time. A sky I would look up to every night and wish to wake up from this nightmare. I closed my eyes and breathed in the winds of Korea one last time.

I've been wondering what life would have looked like if we had money. Maybe if we were born into a different family. Would I be like Hyorim or like the bullies that fractured my hand? Would I still love my sisters or hate their love like I used to? Would I still paint and fade away with each stroke of a brush?

I've also thought of my parents more often. Unnie said she planned on not telling them anything. They don't deserve to know. She may act kind in the group chat but she doesn't even care about our lives.

I wouldn't care for three women that do nothing but fail. Three women that are so small in this large world, they are too weak to defeat the darkness. They're drowning so much that it's impossible to stay alive.

Will this new world be as dark? Will we disappear into its abyss this time or will we thrive? Will we get back up stronger and more alive? Will we show the world what they've been missing with each smile from In-joo? With each epiphany from In-kyung? With each drawing I create? Will we be silenced this time or stand taller for the people that struggle with us?

Will we finally find love? A love so deep that's inevitable to forget just like the dreams I get from my dead sister.

The night before we left for the airport, I played the guitar on that rooftop one last time. I imagined Hyorim with me. I imagined my parents and my dead sister were there with me. I sang for the first time and I laughed. I didn't know I was so bad at singing.

What else don't I know about myself? Is it possible that poverty is like chains for those of us that are less fortunate? Have we gotten used to its heaviness that we just lower our heads out of instinct?

Then again, we would be dead if we don't hide away.

But in this new world...everyone is brave. Everyone, even the poor, has dignity. I see it on the streets. There are those that sleep on them but they still have their last shine in their dark eyes threatening to break through someday.

We finally found our breakthrough as we step off the plane. I'm perplexed. I have no words for this new world of buzzing people. For once, the world does not let me numb it out. It tells me to go among the crowd of people filled with dreams.

I belong with them.

Watching my sister hug Jongho for the first time in a whole year was the last stroke I needed to see the finished masterpiece. I step back and look at my sisters smile without restraint. I've never seen them as beautiful as they are now. Jongho kisses my sister's forehead and I hold back tears at her loving eyes. In-joo puts a warm hand on my back and I look up at her. She's finally smiling at me with pride for her decision. I finally let my heart rest in peace for the consequences of this decision.

And so I look up at these new skies. It's clear and vivid with the summer sunlight bringing my heart back to life. The air shows me how to breathe again and I listen to my heartbeat without a nervous skip.

This new world is ours. We've finally woken up from our nightmare and witnessed our dreams come true. Hope has become part of this world we've always dreamed of. I can almost grasp it. I just know it deep within my nervous thoughts. I watch Jongho get on another set of electric stairs first, and my sisters wait for me to step on with them.

Excitement and fear makes me take a cautious step forward, but I don't run away this time. I take their hands and smile with them. I'm no longer afraid of what is behind my shoulder because I see hope shine on their beautiful faces.

We look out the large windows of the airport as we slowly go down the electric stairs and take in the sunset beaming a new light in this entire building. Now that's a sight worth drawing.

At last, a world where I can finally find its true colors.