Can't You See Me?

Twenty three

It's been months since the moment when Haerin climbed up the side of my house and tried to break in through my window. There is a week left in the school year and then I'll graduate and leave this place forever. Haerin convinced me a while ago to go to Yale and leave everything here behind and start new. She said it would be for the best and honestly it took a while to convince me, but she did.

"I don't want to go."

"MJ, if you don't go you'll regret it." The younger girl that was leaning against the headboard of my bed said with a sad smile on her face. Haerin started calling me MJ after she watched my many failed attempts of shooting hoops with Hanni in the spring. MJ after Michael Jordan of course.

"But what about Dani and Hyein, my family, and you? What will happen if I leave?" I sit down in front of her crossing my legs with a pout on my face. I don't want to leave her. Two years is a long time, anything can happen.

"Hanni will be with you. It's not like you'll be alone, you'll have a friend."

"You know that's not what I mean." The younger girl just sighs and closes her eyes.

"Minji if you stay here you'll end up hating your life and eventually me for being the reason you stay. We will still see each other on breaks and once I'm done with school I also want to go to school in America." She does? I reach over and grab her soft hands, putting them in my lap.

"I didn't know that. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Well I wasn't sure till a couple of weeks ago, but I think leaving Korea and my father would be good for me."

"There are other places to go to school besides America." I joke with the younger, but her face becomes serious.

"Those places don't have you."

"Okay I'll go, but promise me we can try again in two years."

"I already told you we could after I graduate." Haerin laughs, removing her hands from my lap and stretching.

"Haerin I mean it. I know we are friends and we've set boundaries, but that doesn't mean I've stopped loving you. I will never stop loving you as long as I live." Haerin became silent and turned her face away from mine looking everywhere but me.

"We are friends. I don't want to talk about anything like that until I get my life sorted out. You know that. Please don't say things like that." I sigh, getting up from my bed pacing. Maybe getting away from her for a while will do us both good. "I better go." And she went.

-

Haerin distanced herself from me after that. Not completely we still hung out together with Dani and Hanni and occasionally Hyein, but never alone again. She also stopped updating me about her and Niki, but I know she still doesn't like him because Dani updates me every now and then since Haerin likes to confide in her. They have gotten so close over the last few months it's hard to see one without the other. It hurt at first but after Dani reassured me they were just friends and she feels nothing romantic towards Haerin I felt better.

Hanni still hasn't said anything to Danielle about her feelings and I don't think she ever will. Especially since school is ending very soon and both of us will be spending our summer break in Spain before we leave for college. I'm glad Hanni is going with me. I don't know if I would have been able to get through all this without her by my side.

"Why are you crying?" I looked over and realized Danielle was just crying silently to herself. Danielle crying is an anomaly honestly. After years of knowing her I can count on one hand how many times I've seen her cry.