Fire Meets Gasoline : Wildfire

Chapter Ten : Fallout

    MIKE TORRENTES. I took the risk. While John was saying all those words of hope yet sadness, something struck me in the heart, it was like I was seeing him in a different perspective. I was so focused on the plan of revenge, that I found myself blind to others around me. I was still considerate of their feelings and all, but I wasn't able to see them. But then I did.

It was a little bit awkward after we kissed, the snow around us kept getting into our eyes and the only ray of sunshine that there was suddenly hid in the clouds, making everything extremely dark again. We took the wood logs that we had and walked back to Alex's house. While we organized the logs in the basement, I kept thinking about what John said, after all he did say he was going to turn himself in just like I would. It didn't make sense to me, why would he do that even though he never caused any of this? Was his guilt bigger than mine and I never noticed? Or was it simply the right thing for both of us to do and I simply wasn't ready to admit?

After we were all done with making dinner and decorating the table, we heard the sound of a truck parking and immediately ran to see if it was Lin and Jennifer, and gladly it was. Jennifer explained to us how she would be taking a couple meds and having to visit the clinic regularly for exams and all that shit. Lin, on the other hand, was pissed that he still would be stuck in Elko for more than he wanted to, it turned out he was somehow pumped to join our little adventure to Seattle.

As we were all sitting and ready to eat dinner, Alex got up and asked us if we could pray with him. I'm going to be honest, but I was never a religious person, and I said that before, but, being around the people I loved, watching them being happy to be even alive that day, made me feel thankful and even appreciative of the man up in the clouds, even if I wasn't sure he existed. We all had gone through so much, and at the same time I was feeling all those good emotions. I was still feeling guilty for putting them in a situation where they could only feel happiness in rare events, and most of the time being afraid of getting a bullet on their skull.

I guess I wasn't the only one feeling that way though, as we were quietly enjoying the food Alex made, John decided to open up to Lin and Jennifer about how his mom called and told him it was better to turn himself in. Lin was furious, he smashed down the table and shouted how stupid that idea was, he even showed us his true feelings about everything, saying how we got them into this mess we all found ourselves in, and that it was unfair to surrender at that moment. Jennifer tried calming everyone down, but even through her words of peace, I could still feel her anger towards John's decision, and eventually mine as well. I took the chance to say I was going to do the same thing, and that just put things into a whole different spin. Lin begged me to give up on that idea, even after I explained I wasn't going to do any type of surrender before dealing with Hera myself, but that wasn't enough for him.

A dinner that was supposed to be about appreciation and joy, turned into a tug of war of blame and guilt, something I was very familiar with. No one wanted to end things the way it was being planned, no one wanted to stay in prison for years and years, it was just too hard for them to accept things would have to go that way.

Alex took everyone's plates and went to the kitchen and said he would need a minute, so then it was just me, John, Lin, and Jennifer, staring at each other with anger and sadness up our fists.

"Do you really have to do it?" Lin asked "Can't y'all-I don't know-fake your death or something?"

"If we do that, then we'll be running for the rest of our lives!" I tried to explain.

"And it would not solve anything" John said "They would come for you too!"

Lin closed his eyes and sighed, put his hands up on his face and struggled to even be still, out of everyone, he was the one that hated the plan the most. I took that chance and tried touching his hand as a sign of comfort and solidarity, but it wasn't enough for him to calm down.