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DEFINITION: Letting go willfully; making peace with change to obtain balance and understanding
PHYSICAL SIGNALS AND BEHAVIORS:
- One's shoulders and body loosening slightly as tension ebbs - Taking in a cleansing breath - Nodding - A smile that grows -Stretching (shaking out one's arms, rolling the shoulders, curling the toes, etc.) to physically embrace a new mindset
- Lifting one's eyes to make contact with someone - One's gaze going from unfocused to focused - Lifting one's head to look straight forward or up - Eyes that brighten after making the decision to move forward - Verbalizing one's decision to let go: "You know, I'm okay with it," or "This will work out."
- Moving closer to other people; no longer feeling as though one needs distance - Welcoming others into one's personal space (holding a hand out, gesturing someone to come near) - Mirroring someone's body language to build rapport (facing them, adopting their gestures) - Shaking someone's hand - Making a joke to lighten the mood
- Grinning genuinely - Giving a suggestion or bit of advice as a peace offering: "I bet if you hold out this apple the horse will come to you." - Touching someone in an offering of personal contact (a light touch on their arm or shoulder, etc.) - Politeness with others - Listening intently
- Sitting with one's palms facing up - Lifting one's hand to the chest - Engaging in conversation - A light tone of voice - An open body posture (arms away from the body, legs slightly apart, chest out)Giving someone an embrace or openly accepting one
- Being honest with others - Light-hearted laughter - Strong eye contact during conversation - Asking for advice out of true interest or to make someone feel valued - Discussing and making future plans with others
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INTERNAL SENSATIONS:
A chest that loosens or feels lighter
Breath that seems to come a little easier
MENTAL RESPONSES:
A lessening need to review past struggles and obstacles
Being cautiously optimistic
Thinking about the future and what new things it will bring
Experiencing a mood boost when realizing that certain worries or stressors can be let go
A desire to share the moment with others
Thoughts turning to the new situation and how one can best move forward
Being ready to let go of past upsets
CUES OF ACUTE OR LONG TERM ACCEPTANCE:
Confidence
Feeling happy and full of purpose (having a clear direction, knowing what goals to pursue, etc.)
Forging strong, genuine relationships
Clear-headedness and optimism
MAY ESCALATE TO:
Satisfaction, Peacefulness, Excitement
CUES OF SUPPRESSED ACCEPTANCE:
Light-hearted teasing: "I guess you can live here. We needed someone to change the litter box anyway."
Setting conditions in mock seriousness: "Okay, you can move out, but you have to promise to call every Sunday!"
Dragging out one's words to pretend that one is really struggling with the decision
Pretending to pout or otherwise hide one's enthusiasm
Keeping one's choices and feelings a secret until the time is right
