A Piece of Me

47

Elizabeth's pov

Before things could escalate any further, someone came crashing down the hallway, causing Jake and I to jump away from each other.

The bathroom door burst open, and I was half expecting police to come in with guns, but it was only Colby.

Anger fueled me as he saw me, his worried expression showing none of his behavior from earlier.

I wonder if he would tell me what he was doing with that girl. Cheating, like me? Most likely.

"Jesus Christ Liz you scared the shit out of me," Colby said, darting in and hugging me tightly.

A mixture of knowing that Jake was behind me, watching this encounter and the meth fueling me, I was hesitant to return any sign of affection.

My anger crashed into sadness, into a heart-aching seize for everything to be all right. In Colby's arms, I could almost hide from our mistakes.

I could almost deny I did anything wrong, and pretend I never saw what Colby did to me.

I went into overdrive, suddenly clinging onto him as my breathing was a shallow, quick and uneven reminder that I was still living.

One thing I forgot about being high on meth was that exerting myself in physical activity, like running from getting busted by cops and intensely making out, left my breathing short. My lungs couldn't take in air properly, causing my heart rate to go up in panic as I struggled to breathe with my face buried in Colby's shirt.

"You didn't send her up here?" Jake asked, his tone confused.

"No, I was trying to get a new connection since Aryia is getting clean," He answered, rubbing my back as he continued to talk, "I didn't see her come out when the cops busted us. They just left, so you two don't have to stay in my bathroom anymore,"

"Great," Jake said, "She's pretty worked up," He noted before slipping past us and walking out.

It took only about three seconds before Colby froze, pulling me back and studying my face, "I thought Jake was the one that was high, but I can still smell it,"

Meth had an odor? I must have forgotten about that too. But between my glassy eyes, my crusty and stuffy nose, and the apparent scent of crank, it was very obvious that I was high.

"What are you talking about?" I spat, trying my best to deny it.

"Why the fuck did you relapse?" Colby asked, his eyes narrowed as he studied me, "Did Zane and Heath convince you to do fucking meth again?"

"What? No, you were cheating on me you asshole," I said, pushing away from him.

"What are you talking about? Clearly, you know what it takes for someone to give you what you want. I wasn't cheating, I was getting weed," He explained, and it occured to me that I got high the same way Colby got a new link.

I had felt Mike up, just as that girl had to him. So we were both equally guilty.

"I didn't- I didn't realize-" I stopped myself, not willing to lie more than I had to.

I've been wanting to get high for a while now, I only used Colby as a scapegoat to make myself think it was okay.

And it was, because I was happy now. I was high and I felt better, but Colby was ruining it for me.

"So we're equally wrong," I decided out loud, and he shook his head. "No, Liz, I got weed for fun while you got an addiction, big difference. I feel like rehab is something you should consider,"

"What? No. I slipped up one time and you want to send me away? How about we reconsider this, yeah? I don't have a problem, I'm in control," I said, backing away from him as he took a step closer, shutting the bathroom door as people came up the stairs.

"That's what you think, but you're wrong. I know what meth does to people, and it destroys their lives. I don't want you to be like that, and I don't want anything to happen with our baby," He spoke in a rushed, quiet tone.

"I'll get clean without rehab," I swore, not knowing how much he believed me.

"Fine. But if I ever see you high ever again then that's where you're going," He warned, opening the door before leading the way to his bedroom.

"What are you doing?" I asked, tapping my fingers against my legs as I followed him.

"Going to bed," He said, taking off his shirt and leaving it on the floor, "Come on,"

I wiggled my way out of my jeans, leaving everything else on. One thing I knew about snorting meth was that I wouldn't be able to sleep.

I would stay up all night, and all night tomorrow until I crashed the day after that.

Then came withdrawal, which would be a bitch.

I sighed, crawling to my side of the bed. I was so hot, but I knew better than to sleep without the blankets over me.

All night long I would freeze even though this house is a sana.

Colby slid in bed behind me, but didn't bother to try and come any closer than he had to.

I could tell he was angry, and rightfully so. His girlfriend got high without him, and if I were in his shoes I would be angry too.

But I wasn't, so I waited for his breathing to slow before I rolled over, resting the side of my head on my arm.

He was on his back, his face creased in his sleep. The monster in me wanted him so bad, wanted him to be high too so he would want me.

But the Liz in me, the one screaming for freedom, had better control over that part right now. I reached out, grabbing his hand that was on his stomach.

I carrassed his knuckles with my thumb, and he had no reaction.

He was dead to the world. I wish I was that way too: dead.