Give me Love

20. Reluctant Returns

You spent just under a week at the beach house. In the morning you would usually wake to Loki either cooking breakfast, or teasing your body until you woke up to the sounds of your own sleepy moans - - and this morning was no different. You heard Loki stir around dawn, and slip out of bed, but you didn't get up; you were too tired and sore to gather enough strength to even open your eyes. A while later Loki returned to your side and wrapped his arms around you before gently kissing down your cheek. You groaned softly and shifted in his arms,

"Wake up (Name)."

"Not yet..." you mumbled and pulled the covers over your head slowly.

"It's passed lunchtime." He said.

"We were up until four this morning thanks to you..." You mumbled into the pillow. Loki sighed and removed himself from the bed.

"Come down stairs when you're ready." He said with a nonchalant wave of his hand.

Just after Loki passed through the doorway, you sat up and yawned long and deep, before you rubbed your eyes and swung your legs over the edge of the bed. You heard Loki's footsteps disappearing down the hall, but you didn't feel a need to hurry your movements, was it because you were too tired? Most likely. Or were you slowly coming to relax around him? You ran a hand through your hair to remove it from your eyes and stepped out of the room. No... Maybe...? You shook your head and made your way through the bedroom.

Without thinking, your hand ran over your sensitive, hickey covered neck. Loki had been slowly increasing the amount of sexual contact he had with you. You were sure he thought you hadn't noticed, but you had. It wasn't like you didn't enjoy it – you enjoyed it thoroughly – but a small nagging voice in the back of your mind had become louder over the past few days, and you couldn't quite make out what it was saying. It irked you to no end. Your hand slipped to the small, healed gash in your arm. 'but as a gift... I will give you the chance to carry my child...' You bit your lower lip. Was that what the little voice was warning you about? Over the week there had been instances that reminded you of that night; but it had never been so clear in your mind before. Is that what he still wanted? You walking slowed. No. No, he had changed... He wasn't like that anymore. You took a deep breath and picked up your pace once more, uncertainty still lingered in your mind. You had to ask him... You had to ask him what was going to happen, what he wanted to happen... You couldn't get pregnant... not like this, not now...

Your mind was so preoccupied trying to straighten out your emotions that you didn't notice the sharp corner of the wall, and walked straight into it.

"Damn it!" you cursed while stumbling backwards and quickly pressing your hands to your bleeding forehead. You were aware of the low railing separating you from a small but dangerous fall; so you tried to stay as close to the solid wall as you could - - but your warping vision and dizziness made it difficult. Before you knew it, Loki had returned to your side and was working on steadying your swaying body.

"Easy..." his tone was smooth and soothing. You grabbed his shoulder as your legs trembled and threatened to give out from under you. "Sit down..." he said while guiding you to sit down on the top step. The pain in your head was only made worse when Loki pulled your hand away, and the constant rushing of the water feature to your right certainly wasn't helping. You winced as Loki gently prodded the bleeding wound. "How did you manage to run directly into the wall?" he asked with an amused tone; however the throbbing pain stopped you from finding the funny side in it all.

"It wasn't like I was trying to..." you stated dully. "I was just thinking..."

"About?"

"About..." Ask him.... Ask him! "About how things have changed... It's just a little strange thinking back... I-I'm finally comfortable..." you lost your nerve at the last minute and changed your mind. However Loki still seemed to react badly to it. You bit the inside of your lip when you felt his hands freeze and you could feel and partially see his eyes trailing over you, which made you lower your still hazy gaze.

"Then don't think back... Don't dwell on the past." he stated simply. "This may hurt..." he said before you could reply. Your brows furrowed,

"Wha- ah!" you winced and tried to pull away, but Loki held you still. The pain in your head increased tenfold. It felt like a searing hot needle was passing through your skull, but instead of burning the area around it, your skin felt like it was freezing. You tightly closed your eyes and held your breath; that was when the pain began to subside.