"UCHIHA! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?"
"Nothing at all," says a voice Konan thought she would never hear again. "I simply put us all in Tsukuyomi so we could talk without being interrupted."
She looks to her left. Nagato's jaw has dropped.
"IF YOU WEREN'T ALREADY DEAD, I WOULD KILL YOU! ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT... COME HERE AND LET ME KILL YOU AGAIN."
Konan looks to her right. There, Itachi stands. He sends her a little smile. Her jaw then drops.
He looks like he'd just lost a serious battle. Around the corners of his mouth and eyes are trails of blood. His chain shirt is torn in some places, and predictably bloody.
He looks like a man who has just been killed by his brother.
"How the fuck–"
Said brother is passed out drunk, face down, in a puddle.
They're somewhere with endless blue skies reflected by watery white ground. A salt flat, she realizes from the smell.
"Before Orochimaru left," says Itachi, "I tricked him into giving me the basis for his cursed seal. I spent years tinkering with it until I figured out how to create a seal that would allow a chakra imprint of my consciousness to attach to Sasuke. It was harder than I had anticipated, as the original seal subliminally influenced the person it was placed on."
"...Haven't you been dead for months?"
"Precisely," Itachi cocks his head and oh boy is that creepy , "I concentrated and spent years storing chakra into this seal. When it runs out, I'll disappear."
"So, you're some sort of fucked up seal ghost." Konan says.
Itachi smiles ever so slightly. "A chakra impression, actually. I'm here to make sure my little brother doesn't do anything stupid."
"Right," Nagato says warily.
"I wasn't finished yet," the Nine Tails snaps. There's no bijuu towering over them. He's still possessing the jinchuuriki. "I demand an explanation!"
"An explanation? An explanation for what?"
"I am going to fucking eat you," The Nine Tails says, hatred clouding its narrowed red eyes. "Why are you collecting the tailed beasts? I won't ask nicely again..."
Killing intent floods the space. Potent and hot, like a visible heatwave on a hundred degree day.
"Kurama, that's enough. Let me handle this."
"Wha–"
Itachi and the possessed jinchuuriki exchange looks, which turns into a conversation consisting of expressions.
"What the fuck is happening, " Konan mouths, turning to Nagato. He looks just as utterly bewildered as she feels. This is not how she had anticipated her night going, honestly.
"I have no fucking clue, do we still try to– you know, " he tilts his head towards the jinchuuriki, shouting at this point and gesticulating wildly.
In his puddle, Uchiha Sasuke snores. He sounds like he's half-drowning, half-coughing. He's dead asleep.
Konan shakes her head ever so slightly.
"It's nice seeing the both of you again. I hadn't really thought I would."
"Neither did we," Nagato replies.
Barring the Rinne Tensei, they had thought that once people died, they generally stayed dead.
YOU ARE READING
Ain't That a Kick in The Head?
FanfictionSasuke feels haunted by Itachi's death. Literally. During their fight, his brother placed a seal with the remainder of his chakra on him as a protective measure so he could watch him from the grave. Itachi, however, did not realize that his actions...
