The World is Quiet Here - ASOUE

The Wide Window: Part Two (1/2)

""Christopher, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny:"" Klaus read. ""By the time you read this note, my life will be at it's end. My heart is as cold as Ike, and I find my life inbearable. I know your children may not understand the sad life of a dowadger, or what would have lead...' leadled me to this desperate akt... but please know that I am much happier this way. As my last will and testament, I leave you three in the care of Captain Sham, a kind and honorable men. Please think of me kindly, even though I'd done this terrible thing.Josephine Anwhistle.""

"It can't be," Violet said disbelievingly.

Chris swallowed the lump in his throat. "It just... it can't be."

~*~

"Can't be," Lemony began, once again standing in the wreckage of what used to be Aunt Josephine's home. "When you lose someone important to you, "it can't be" are often the words that run through your saddened head. It can't be that I've lost someone so important. It can't be that I will never see them again. It can't be, it can't be... it can't be. My name is Lemony Snicket, and it is my job to report the history of the Baudelaire and Taylor orphans, but it can't be that you have nothing better to do. The Baudelaires and Chris believed, incorrectly, that they would never see their Aunt Josephine again, but it can't be that you are interested in watching them suffer as her last words echo again and again throughout her empty and doomed house. It can't be."

~*~

Violet, Klaus, and Chris were now crowded around Josephine's telephone. Violet had placed a call to Mr. Poe at the bank and was now reading aloud Aunt Josephine's letter to him. Klaus and Chris, meanwhile, were leaning over, trying to hear more of the conversation.

""As my last will and testament, I leave you three in the care of Captain Sham, a kind and honorable men. Please think of me kindly even though I'd done this terrible thing."" Violet finished reading, as she listened to the banker man's response, a fake, bubbly frontier in her voice. "Yes, yes. I understand. I'll tell them. Of course, I'll tell them. I promise I'll tell them. Goodbye."

Violet hung up the phone, dropped the bubbliness, and handed Klaus back the letter. "Mr. Poe says we can always rely on Mulctuary Money Management."

Chris blinked in disbelief. "He just heard that a woman committed suicide, and he doesn't even offer condolences? Just that we can always rely on his bank? The audacity of this man."

Klaus didn't seem to hear, as he was still glancing at the letter. "I just can't believe it."

"It's all there in ink and shaky handwriting," Violet pointed out. "Aunt Josephine is dead and she's left us in the care of Count Olaf."

"It's not right," Klaus shook his head, still scrutinizing the note. "There's something funny about this note."

At Klaus' words, Chris looked closely at the note as well, and noticed that there was definitely something strange about the note. There were lots of spelling and grammar mistakes throughout the message, which was strange since Aunt Josephine was supposedly an expert at grammar.

But if she was an expert, why were there so many mistakes?

Violet gaped at her brother. "There's nothing funny about a woman throwing herself out a window."

"I don't think Klaus meant funny as in hilarious," Chris tried to calm the girl down. "I'm sure he meant funny as in strange. Because he's right, there's definitely something strange about the message. Let us show you."

The three eldest children moved to the library, where Klaus set the letter down on one of the desks. Violet and Chris moved to stand next to him, as they all crowded around the note. Klaus turned on a lamp so that they all could see the message better.