Swan Song

Ten

Hopelessly holding on to all those perfect nights.
Let's pretend it's not gone.
Say we'll never die.
———————

You'd think that knowing the biggest competition of my life was coming up, I'd get some sleep but I was far from. When my alarm went off, I quickly tapped the stop button and sighed. No sleep and a competition within hours but there was no going back—with or without rest, I had to get up.

Wake up. Today's the day!

I hit send on my message to Matt before swinging my legs over the edge of my bed and stretching. I reluctantly crawled out of my bed and found my mom and brothers in the kitchen with my dad coming in the front door from the driving range.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Waffles are on your plate so eat up so you can get ready," my mom called out and I yawned as I plopped down at the table.

"You look like shit," Owen grumbled. "Did you not sleep?"

"Thanks for that," I muttered back, shaking my head. "Kind of hard to sleep when your world feels like it's falling apart."

"Well maybe turn that frown upside down. You have a competition to win," Oliver chimed in. "Makeup is on the counter and so is all of that other girly shit you had me grab from your house."

"Here," dad said, setting down a venti caramel Frappuccino down in front of me. "I kind of figured you would need some caffeine."

"Oh great. Something to make my anxiety worse," I teased before taking a sip. "Thanks, dad."

"You're welcome. Now eat, little duck."

I offered him a grateful smile before eating the waffles and sausage my mom had served for me.

Within half an hour, I was showered and blow drying my hair but as badly as I wanted to think about my competition, I could only think of Jake and the betrayal I had been faced with.

Once I had gone through the motions and curled my hair and done my makeup, I grabbed my dress and left my parents house to the rink where Matt was already waiting for me.

As I climbed into my jeep, I noticed Jake driving around the cul-de-sac and presumed he was going to make another attempt to speak to me.

"Brave," I muttered knowing my dad was home this time around.

Without acknowledging him any further, I turned the music up and went through the routine in my mind as I made the drive to the rink.

Once I made it, I grabbed my bag and dress and got inside before quickly getting dressed. Once I finished getting dressed, I stepped out of the bathroom to look in the mirror and smoothed out my turquoise dress as I watched Matt walk over through the reflection.

"You look the part," I said softly as I took note of his beige top with a purple vest buttoned over it.

"Want to talk about it before we go out there?" He questioned as he noticed my demeanor.

"Not exactly," I admitted, forcing a smile. "I don't want anything to get in the way of us winning this."

"I got here early and Kat and Steve have a solid performance down. I watched their rehearsal this morning," Matt admitted.

"We can do this, Matt. This was the first song we ever danced to."

"And now we have improved choreography."

"Something like that," I laughed. "You got our mix to them?"

"Done and done, princess."

I rolled my eyes at Matt's comment before we left our stuff behind and watched our competition.

Though I normally would've talked to my family before my performance, this felt different. I was exhausted and I knew that if I talked to my family, I'd have a break down from all of the emotions that I had been feeling.

When Matt and I were finally on deck, we began to stretch as we waited for our turn on the ice. I took all of the deep breaths that I could as the Zamboni cleared the ice and then Matt and I made ourselves front and center.

The arena lights were dimmed and I took one final deep breath as I heard the intro to our song— A Whole New World. For a brief moment all I could remember was Matt and I dancing to the same song when we were six years old at our first ever competition and here we were twenty four years later.

As the music played, we glided across the ice and the music took over. Suddenly it was like we were one person in two bodies as we moved perfectly in sync. With each movement, we could hear whoops and hollers from the crowd and I was thankful that we couldn't see past the ice.

"A thrilling chase, a wondrous place for you and me," is all I heard as our performance came to an end and we finished center ice, our faces close but never touching.

When the music truly ended, we hugged and cheered amongst one another as the scores were tallied. As the lights came on, I saw that my normal cheering section was three times as big and I realized that not only was my family present but so was my entire squadron—Jake included.

"That's new," Matt whispered to me.

As the scores were shown, we were shocked and thrilled with our score—second highest for the day right behind Kat and Steve by less than a point.

Hand in hand, Matt and I skated off of the ice and once we were in the locker room, he picked me up and spun me around. I squealed and cheered as he set me back down before hugging him once more.

Matt was easily the kindest human I had ever known and despite our chemistry, I wasn't his type even though my mom championed an effort to get us together all throughout high school.

"Get out there! Cody and the kids are waiting for you," I encouraged him, placing a friendly kiss on his cheek.

He nodded and got out of his skates before grabbing his bag to join his family near where mine had been sitting.

As my adrenaline wore off, I took a seat and pulled my own skates off before throwing them at my duffel bag. With each passing second, the emotions I had been feeling for the previous twenty four hours had caught up with me and I began to sob. Luckily the locker room had been empty and I was free to feel my emotions.

"You had a great performance, you know. I didn't know what to expect but it wasn't that."

I wiped my eyes and looked at the doorway where Jake had been leaning against the frame.

"What are you doing here?" I managed to choke out.

"Not important," he replied as he moved to crouch in front of me, taking my hands in his. "Odette, I'm so sorry."

I looked at Jake and wanted nothing more than for him to wrap me in his arms and tell me that everything would be okay but I knew that I had to restrain myself.

"I think you need to leave," I whispered, pulling my hands out of his. "This is the one thing I've had to look forward to and you ruined it by showing up and dragging everyone else along."

"Odette, please."

"Go!"

I swallowed hard as Jake put his hands up in defeat and walked out of the locker room.

Damn him and his stupid face for ruining what should be one of the best days of my life.

———
I can't give ice dancers enough credit! I suggest watching Tessa Virtue & Scott Moir's 2018 Olympic Performance (Moulin Rouge), as it's what I envisioned for Odette and Matt's performance here to A Whole New World.