Brave enough

Cap. 9: Love's just a feeling

I sit down next to him on the couch. He slips the dvd in the player and makes it start. I love this movie! Wait why do I feel an electric shiver on my shoulder? Is he hugging me? Wait, why am I curling up in his embrace? Body stop, STOP! Oh, fuck too late. I an lost cause.

It's always beautiful wearing this dress but not this time! I felt asleep, didn't I? wake up come on I'm still at Nik's place! You can't fall asleep while watching a movie!

I open my eyes I can feel Nik's arms around me, his sweet smell on my skin, wait do I have his hoodie laying on me as a blanket?

Nik: "Good evening"

Me: "Good evening, sorry I must have fallen asleep"

Nik: "I noticed"

Me: "Why did you put your hoodie on me?"

Nik: "You were shaking tremendously"

Me: "But now you are cold"

Nik: "Not for real, you are quite warm"

Me: "Oh...thank you then"

Nik: "You can take it"

Me: "No...I can't"

What if Susan sees it?

Nik: "Come on just for the way home, your jacket it's too light you have to wear an additional layer"

Me: "Are you sure?"

Nik: "Sure"

Me: "Wait what time is it?"

Nik: "10 pm"

Me: "Few, just in time! I don't have to return home too late, you know the overprotective dog"

Nik: "Yeah I know, let's go home then"

Me: "Sure"

I slip in the hoodie, woah is so warm, and it smells like him...FUCK STOP IT NOW!

***

I wake up a little dizzy...sleeping at Nik's house yesterday evening hadn't helped my sleep routine. I watch the clock, huff 6 a.m. There's no way I can came back to sleep now. I roll on my left side, what's in my bed today that is so comfy? Wait am I still wearing Nik's hoodie? I'm irrecoverable! I get out of my bed; I can try to make some homework maybe it can help.

Fine homework for the weekend done, and it's only 9 in the morning! I should consider waking up at this hour every Saturday. Drin. An message from Susan?

"Wanna hung out later? Or too many homework?"

"Got up at six, already done all my homework, see you at?"

"Woah, am I sure I'm talking to my bestie?"

"Just had struggle sleeping"

"Well see you at 2 p.m. in the park then"

"See you later"

I have to tell her, this afternoon. It will be simple. "Hey Su, I'm dating Nik" and hoping she won't kill me.

Susan: "Hey you!"

Me: "Hey Su"

Susan: "Everything fine?"

Me: "Sure, how about you? You seem scared!"

Susan: "Well I have to meet Nik tomorrow to try out our lines!"

Crap I forgot about that.

Me: "Oh yeah..."

Susan: "You have to help choose an outfit"

Me: "Sure, but Su...hem I have to tell you something"

Susan: "Then the makeup and hair and don't forget for a perfect scenario for kissing him! Sorry you were saying?"

She seems so exited...why do I have to ruin her date? Wait a lightbulb!

Me: "Just checking if you were fine Su...I'm worried: you just exited a toxic relationship and you almost got raped from your ex...maybe it's too early?"

Susan: "Oh I understand your worries, but calm down I'm ready. I told you I've been liking Nik for years; he is the right one I can feel it"

Me: "If you say so..."

Fuck! It didn't work

Susan: "Let's get home and choose an outfit, you have style you know?"

Me: "Pff bitch please!"

We came back to her house to choose an outfit for her date. She has lots of clothes and she can't combine them right! Let me do this for you Susy, I'm a master in this kind of stuff. Maybe if I make her look the way I know Nik would like, she will have more chances than me.

Me: "Do you have something blue-green?"

Susan: "Hey this is your favourite colour! I have to dress for Nik not for you!"

Me: "I know but you asked for my help! Do you want some style or not?"

Susan: "Sure, let me check...I have this sweater, can it fit?"

Me: "Perfect, then do you have white trousers?"

Susan: "Sure...there you are!"

Me: "Ok, go change we have to try out even the makeup ah and don't forget about the accessories!"

Susan: "Ok captain"

Wow she looks perfect with this outfit and this makeup! Nik will for sure like her

Me: "Wow Susy you are stunning!"

Susan: "Do you think?"

Me: "Yeah, you are simply...perfect!"

Susan: "Well thanks to you!"

Me: "I know, I know"

I say making the "I am da queen girl" voice.

Susan: "Oh stop it! ahahahahahahah"

Me: "hahahahah"

Susan: "But really thank you for your help I really appreciate it. You are wonderful"

Me: "You don't have to thank me, everything for you Susy"

She hugs me tight, fuck I can't handle this, but I can hide my tears till I get home.

I walk up the stairs of my house, my limbs seem to weight tons. I let myself fall on the bed, oh look Nik's hoodie is still hanged on the headboard. I can't resist I have to put it on...maybe just this time to forget about him. Sure. I slip inside. Some music? Already opened the album...what a better title than "Love's just a feeling". I roll on my belly pushing my face right in the pillow. I start sobbing quietly. Ok maybe the wrong song...

Drin.

"Everything fine milady?"

Are you kidding?

"Not really"

"Wanna hung out tomorrow after I meet Susan?"

"Not really, I have tons of homework to do"

"Ok than...see you on Monday at school"

"Sure, have a good weekend sir Nik"

"You too milady"