Mercenaries of the Gods: Chronicle Three - Cataclysm

The Dragon's Stash

"...and that was the fucking awesome time I cussed out nine pissy fucking Gods to stop Alan here from getting his ass fucking raped in jail." Rina says as he passes the bottle to Amber. 

The portal closes behind them with a pop and Alan lets out a huff. "How many time do I have to tell you; I wouldn't get raped in jail."

 "Did that really happen?" inquires Zori as a light drizzle falls from the gray sky. 

"For the most part." Alan says as he looks around at the damage from the fight between Morothoth and Tiamat. "The part with the cheering didn't happen and I remember she called them sperm gargling douche faces, not troglodyte sucking ass hats." 

"Shut the fuck up you troglodyte sucking ass hat." Rina says causing Amber laugh. 

 "I got to get going. You guys be safe, and I'll be back in a few hours to pick you up. Remember not to fuck up his place too much." Alan opens a portal and looks at Amber and Zori. "You two keep an eye on her and make sure she leaves Morothoth at least one bottle." 

"Shut the fuck up you donkey raping shit eater!" Rina quickly forms six extra arms and give Alan the finger eight times. Alan replies with a sarcastic wave, steps through the portal and it closes behind him with a pop. As Rina snatches the bottle from Amber, she looks down and smiles as the grass hugs her leg. "See, even the grass knows how fucking awesome I am!" 

As Amber and Zori look around, they move closer to each other as they notice the large scars in the earth, the mounds of lava rock laying around and the decaying remains of Seraphs all around them. "What happened here?" Zori says more to herself than to Rina. 

"Just some regular fucking dragon shit." Rina takes a swig from the bottle as she starts moving to the small shack. "Thrack and I threw the fuck down with some Seraphs then watched my bad ass buddy take on a colossal cunt-face named Tiamat till she fucking ran away like a pussy ass bitch." 

"I wouldn't call that regular." Amber says as her and Zori start to follow Rina. "That was rude. Seriously, shut up. It doesn't matter if I am quiet or not, that was still rude." Amber hits herself in the head and her eyes start to tear up. 

Obviously worried, Zori walks over to Amber and gives her a small hug. "Relax my sister. We will find some medication for you soon. I promise." She releases Amber and wipes away her tear. 

"Come on sluts." Rina says as she marches towards Morothoth's house without looking back. "We need to get the fuck inside." 

Still not completely used to Rina's unique way of addressing people, they both give Rina a small glare before continuing on. As they get closer to the shack, Rina tosses the empty bottle to the side as Amber says, "That looks a little small for a dragon." 

"It's a fucking pocket dimension or some shit like that and it's really fucking cool inside but watch out for the fucking river of lava." Amber and Zori look at each other, wondering if this might be a bad idea as the get up to the door. Rina turns and gives them both a powerfully serious look. "Listen closely bitches." She makes her eyes glow, so they know she's serious. "Morothoth keeps his placed locked the fuck up but because his dragon face loves me so fucking much, he showed me the super fucking secret way to get in and if either of you fucking mention it to anyone, I will personally drive a spiral of fucking bamboo up your cunts till it comes out your mother-fucking nose." They both nod, know that she definitely would. Rina looks around and makes sure no one else can see. Trying to be as stealthy as possible, she leans down, slowly picks up a small rock by the edge of the shack and takes a small brass key from under it. 

At the same time, Amber and Zori say "Really?!" 

"I said the same shit when he showed me." Rina sticks the key in the lock, gives it a turn and opens the door. "Dragon face said he's had that fucking key under that rock for twenty fucking thousand years and not one asshole has ever broken the fuck in." Leaning down, she puts the key on the ground and places the rock back over it them motions Amber and Zori inside.