*****Billie's Point Of View*****
When Mike said that, my heart broke. I didn't want her to hurt, I didn't want her to starve, I didn't want her to feel dead inside. She didn't deserve that, not at all. She deserved the world, even more than that. What he told me had made my heart stop, and made the entire world freeze. I stared for a moment, out of the world, just thinking of her. How bad off she must be.
I shook my head, and tried to take a deep breath. The air stung my lungs, and made me wince.
"Is she okay?" I coughed into the phone, not caring about anything but her.
"Shes...out of it." Mike wispered back, making me bite my lip really hard.
"She doesn't deserve this, no one does." I blurted out randomly, and curled my knees into my chest.
"I know, Billie. Right now she needs you, can't I take your place with Tre'?" Mike offered, hopeful.
"Yeah that would be perfect, we're on our way back." I breathed into the phone, clicking it shut, and telling Tre' the news.
He nodded grimly, and turned the truck around. We'll be home in a few hours, I can't wait to see her. Shes staying in my arms until the tears hault. I promise.
*****Kaela's Point Of View*****
Me and Mike were back in the dressing room, sitting in silence. He stared at me long, and hard. I stared back, no color to anything I saw. I hated that, I hope it came back soon. Pretty soon the silence got boring, and Mike plopped back on the floor, trying for sleep. I wish I could sleep, I could daydream, but not sleep. I've tried a million times, but I never get to fall into the sweetness of unconscieness.
I thought about Billie. About how his hair was never fell the same way, whenever I saw him, and it always made me observe it that much more. About how his eyes weren't always the same exact beautiful green, how that got dark whenever there was something wrong, how they got light whenever most things were right. About how he was so against everything, how he wanted it all his way. I loved how he was, it was strange, and complicated but I loved him for him.
The bad part about this whole thing was, I miss him even before he's gone, which makes me feel like I'm getting too close. I can't get close to anyone again, something always made it difficult, or ruined it. I sure as hell couldn't hurt him, that would kill whats left of me thats alive. Maybe it was time to have space between us? Or would that ruin what we already have?
I can't lose him, because I think I love him. Even though hes part of the cause of the death of my best friend. That was mostly me though, all me. I played the wrong cards, and lost. Life was always unpridictable. Thats what was so shitty about it.
I bit my lip, and closed my eyes. It was so hard to think, without Jimmy ruining my thought process. I felt the tears slip away from my eyes, and my body begin to quiver with the sobs which were bursting out. I fell on my side, and continued to cry. I guess it woke Mike up, because he was holding me in his arms soon, rubbing my back.
I hated myself for ruining everyone else, thats what it felt like I've done. It hurt more than anything I've ever felt before. My heart actully had pain in it, that wasn't good either. How could my heart break over someone I didn't love more than a friend, or did I?
"Shhhh, Kaela. Your okay, it's all alright. Nothing that has happened is your fault, everything happens for a reason." Mike soothingly whispered into my ear.
It made me cry even harder, because I knew he was wrong. It was my fault, I made him want to die, and now I was taking it out on everyone else with my stupid tears! I was making everyone even more misrible, and tired. I was making everything worse. I wish I wasn't so entirly stupid.
I felt myself fall into a blackness too strong to reject, maybe I'm spacing out, maybe my mind was trying to excape some pain.
*****Billie's Point Of View*****
***Hours Later***
Almost there, I had to have her in my arms soon. We weren't but a few blocks away, and I couldn't wait to pick her up. I was going to kiss her long enough to make the pain reside just for a few minutes, I was going to hug her until she smiled her old smile, and I was going to be there for her utnil she wanted me gone.
Tre' stopped the car, we were in front of the stage. I scrambled out of the car, and jumped up onto the stage, falling flat on my face. I winced, rubbing my face, but stumbling to my feet, running back to my dressing room. I flung open the door to see Kaela passed out in Mike's arms, she looked terrible. He looked worse.
Mikes hair was completly gone, out of its own mind. He looked older, and looked like he had cried away all tears. He needed a break. I nodded, and he stood, and I replaced his spot under Kaela. She was lighter it seemed, Mike had told me she wasn't eating. She looked like a lost child, who hadn't slept in days out of worry.
Her makeup had blackened her face, and her hair was sticking up in different directions. It was very curly, which told me she had been in the shower. I looked at her wrist, and gasped. There was a deep cut there, dried blood around it. Mike was already gone so I couldn't ask what had happened, so instead I gently kissed it. She barly smiled in her sleep, but she did.
I loved her so much, I wanted her forever. I held her in my arms, and buried my face in her curly brown locks. They smelled sweet, as always, and it made me smile slightly. I couldn't stand to go on without her. I pulled away, and just enjoyed the moment while it lasted. Out of nowhere, shes awake again, and in tears.
She gasped when she saw me, and turned to face me, off of my lap. I brought her into a long hug, and the tears stopped, thank God. She pulled away, and had a 'not so there' smile on her face. She looked so hurt, so torn, I couldn't take it.
"Sweetie, it's all gonna' be okay." I wispered, as she took my hands in her small boney ones.
She leaned in, kissing me on the lips gently. It took me as surpise, and the taste of her was so amazingly sweet. I took it all in, and returned her kiss with more strength. She accepted, and tugged her hands into my hair, messing it up even worse. Tears streaming down her face, the entire time.
I wiped them away slowly with the tip of my thumbs, and contiued a slow, sad kiss. I pulled away, and took her into a hug. We both laid down together, me holding her while she cried.
*****Kaela's Point Of View*****
I was beyond depressed, but Billie was here. He was going to hold me until I smiled. I knew he would. I stared up into his beautiful, bright green eyes, and felt the world around me drift. His eyes always kept me sweetly calm, whenever I was panicy. He was my other half of my heart.
I gently pressed my lips to Billies, feeling that spark between us, and the tears stopped. Kissing him made my heart high, and my stomach drop. It was so amazing just to have him in my life.
"Kaela I love you, forever." Billie whispered, tracing my lips with his thumb, which made me want to laugh because it tickled.
"I love you, too." I replied, keeping my lips only a mere inch away.
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I can't live without you." BIllie breathed, pressing his lips to mine quickly.
"I feel the same," I mumbled though the kiss.
"Marry me?" Billie proposed.
