The Spanish Spotlight (LSD, #4)

6. Sweet Child O' Mine

Sweet Child O' Mine

At the reception desk, I say: "Good morning. Miss Chelsea is here. For the commercial."

"Oh, yes, how nice. Mr Doria told me you were coming. I will call him right away. He's in the studio, preparing the set. He'll be here in five minutes. Would you like a cup of coffee? Tea? Water?"

Chelsea, behind my back, welcomes the offer: "Finally, someone who offers me something to drink. I'm running around all day like crazy, but Mister Arse over here doesn't even think of eating and drinking. I want a BrandiX cola. With ice. And a slice of lemon. And a smile. In a wide glass, like on TV."

The lady at the reception doesn't even blink: "I will bring it right away, Miss. Would you like something, Sir? Coffee? Tea? Water?"

I ask for a coffee, black, no sugar. Chelsea and I take a seat on one of the leather sofas in the waiting area. Chelsea looks at all the bling-bling in the hall (letting you wait and serving you coffee is a psychological trick of companies: not only do they try to impress you with their framed successes, but also do they make you feel obliged to return a favour to your friendly friends, who so generously offer you water, with or without taste), but I look through the glass façade to the real world outside. On the street, a puppy is playing with its tail. The wind blows an empty plastic bottle into its attention. The bottle easily wins the interest-contest from the tail: it's colourful and shining, makes noise, moves in mysterious ways, and it has smell and taste too. The designers of the bottle knew it would be a perfect, irresistible toy for puppies. The puppy chases it, bites it, jumps on it from every side, and is most happy when it discovers the fun of taking the tap in its mouth, shaking the bottle like a cocktail mixer. Mother Nature smiles at me when I realise her lesson: playing is learning, learning is fun, and it helps us to develop useful qualities and skills.

The lady serves our drinks with a smile. Chelsea is impressed: "Why are we here?"

"What was our mission for today? You wanted more followers on Facebook. And what's the best way to get more interest? Marketing. We're here to shoot a commercial, and you're the star.", I say.

"Yeah? Really? Duh! You're kidding me, right?"

"What does this place look like? It's the head office of one of the biggest marketing companies in Spain. They launch publicity campaigns for all the major brands, they design logos, they come up with the most popular slogans, and they invent all those songs little children sing every week at music class. After the USA, Spain has the highest percentage of commercials per hour. If you want more followers on Facebook, there's only one place to go: here."

"wow..."

It looks like I've scored another point on Chelsea's Look-At-Me-I'm-Fabulous-scale. After today's fatal false start, things can only become better. I've learnt from my mistakes. She's the star. I'm the driver. Give her what she wants, and I'll get back what's important for me.

There's Mister Doria. He shakes hands with Chelsea, with a kiss on each cheek and a jovial: "Hello, sweet child o' mine. So you are our star for today? And what a lovely star you are, shining like I could never imagine. I'm Mister Doria, the CEO of C.I.U. Marketing. Please, here's my business card. C.I.U. stands for Coitus Interrupt Us. Our principal weapon in the war for attention is our financial power to interrupt TV programs just before the climax, to get maximum exposure for the products our clients want to push into the market. They say that sex sells, but you have to make people horny first, ha, ha. Please call me Adrián. Will you be so kind to follow me, sweet child? We have prepared everything. All you need is a little make-up and a change of clothes... but, honestly, if I look at you, you're stunning in that black dress, your hair is already perfect, even the shoes are perfect... Let's forget about the make-up and the dressing room. Let's go to the studio right away. I'm delighted to have you here..."