To my rescue

Chapter 53

Alia's POV

I walk away from him like something was stolen inside of me, I don't know how many minutes I spent in the car crying like a baby, but I choose these tears over the one of consequences of turning an oblivious eye to truth and reality. I will see you someday Imran, I wish that you are in a better place in your life, when you are at peace with yourself, I wish you that peace with all my heart.

If I will go back and delete a moment in my life it won't even be the moment I suffered from Rahila matching my confidence and personality but this dreadful moment that I am not sure if I can pass through safely, even before I leave the park, his face was haunting me enough to make me park the car and take in some fresh air.

Imran is a very emotional guy and what I like most about him is the way he doesn't take it as vulnerability at all, he is unapologetically himself even though who he is now is not his actual personality, imagine the moment he finds himself, the genuineness and boldness will be on another level.

If he is feeling the way I am feeling right now, I know he won't hesitate to make it possible and do it for the better. One of the most powerful statements my mom wrote in the diary she left was ‘Whatever you want from someone, give it to yourself first, if you can't do it well or completely let them meet you along the way.’ I stand by it and with it, believing in this makes me the girl I am today, for example, I love my designers and I work to get the money to buy more, not because I don't receive it from my Dad and Brothers but because what is mine is mine and no one can own up to it better and more than me, in another way this is what I want for Imran, if he feels happy with me and purposeless without me, then he needs to learn how to be happy alone, if he really feels like living wouldn't be without me then he really needs to learn how to live alone, if he feels he can do anything to make me happy just for me to stay with him then he needs to learn and understand personality and individual independency.

I don't want him revolving around my palms, I want him to make his choice and to have a clear acknowledgment of them. I want a life for Imran, not just life but a life full of understanding, peace, serenity, happiness, and acceptance, what will be will be.

He needs to understand that he is trying to subjugate himself now, I know he is angry, maybe he won't understand but things will make sense and meaning to him the moment he breaks out this unreal personality that swallows him unidentified.

I kicked the car on and head straight to the shop, I know I will receive tons of questions from Kee but I don't care about answering them, talking to her might be a relief, maybe.

The moment I get into the shop, I head straight to her office, dejá Vu is messing up with my head, reminding me of the time Imran lose it at Freddy's and I came here crying like a baby. Great, I am going to repeat the same thing today, this is what my life is like right now.

“Jesus Christ! What happened Alia, what is it? Kee asked, I am sure the veins that hold her eyes ball are begging her to stop the stress before they give up on her. When I came she was on phone and wasn't paying attention to me as I take a sit on the chair across, until when she dropped the phone.

“It isn't something Important Kee, just don't panic,” I said trying to fake a smile but features are my biggest opposers when it comes to a situation like this.

“I am not paying for that Alia, not at all.” she refused, and she changed her sitting position to the other chair across the table, facing me completely.

“I met Imran,” I said and I saw realization obvious on her face.

“Dis you guys fight or argue? Did he say something to you? She asked very unsurely of what the situation can be.

“We did none of this,” I said and my eyes begin to well up again, this time they are hurting, I cried enough but I can't possibly stop.

“What happened then? She asked desperately.

“We call it off, we are not meeting or talking again,” I announced and lips parted a bit.

“Alia, don't you think this is too much at a time, you are hurting, you guys seem to be more than friends or whatever it is, you guys are kind of connected in some way, you just need to take one step at a time, I guess.” She gently said.

“It is the connection I don't want Kee, it is terrible and not right, the most important thing is, Imran needs to build himself not revolve around me, he needs to live not to exist, he needs to recognize his purpose not to attach with anything possible at a time, in general, he needs to work on his self, that is the only way he can live fully.” I cried.

“Maybe he needs your support Alia, isn't he? She asked.

“Yes he does need my support but being with him will only make him become more and more attached to me, honestly it's unhealthy, I just choose my better worse wisely moreover people can only support you when you are making effort, real effort otherwise motivation won't work, you are just pushing them into it,” I explained and she nodded in agreeance.

“This is smart but a very hard decision Alia, not everyone can choose facts over time range happiness, I hope you can hold up to your decision and he will be wise enough to take the route of making his life better.” She said sadly, I know she is feeling it for me, that is why I love Kee with all my heart.

“I hope so.” I let out a deep breath to get myself together. “Sometimes giving up is the righteous decision you will ever make, not to justify my vulnerability but I know everything is happening for a reason, and the better.”

“You are not vulnerable Alia, you are strong, I am telling you the truth, and I admire you for that, you always stand by facts, and even when you make mistakes it's usually because you want to be on the side of truth, it makes you a better human.” She said and faintly smile.

“You know, Mom asked me if you are dating Imran before the unfortunate event.” She said with a smirk and now I know she wants to mess with me.

“What did you say to her then? I asked, If I know Kee, she will try to scare me, let's see.

“Well, I said, yesss.” She slurred with an annoying grin.

“I know you well enough to know that you are trying to mess with me, Mom knows that I don't date.” I smile, rolling my eyes playfully.

“Maybe not this time, because those pictures that trended last week, are something else.” She said bursting into a serious laugh, I remember Ameer doing the same, their head must be touching somewhere else, I can see.

“I just know that the pictures were technically taken, I didn't even pay attention to it and the last thing I want to do right now is to relate with anything that has to do with Imran,” I said and she smile in an understanding way.

“It’s fine Alia, I won't tease again, not anytime soon.” She winked at me and I smile while getting up.

“I need to go and see what's happening up there Kee, I will see you later,” I said and she nodded with a smile.