Everything Changes

Chapter 30: Everything Changes

                                                 Aria's P.O.V

The hallways looked longer than I remembered and more packed. My right hand started to shake slightly as all eyes turned on me and whispers filled the room. I had to tell myself 'You can do this Aria.' I looked to both sides of me. My brother was standing to the left and Em was to the right of me.

I took another look at Andrew. Remembering the talk we had when I returned home from the hospital. He had spoken to our mom the night before. They talked about how dads death affected him, and she told him what had transpired at the hospital. Which led to our own heart to heart.

We talked about everything, well almost everything. Mostly we talked about the accident. But we did talk about Ryder as well. He told me that he loved me and he never blamed me. I think it was that last thing that I needed to start the healing process.

So no matter what people say to me or about me. I just had to remember that it wasn't my fault, and that I shouldn't blame myself for things that I can't control. Which was easier said than done, but it's a start.

"So we will meet back here after school. Or if you need to, we can go right now." Andrew gave me a pointed look. "I'm fine. I know where to meet you after school, dork. This isn't my first day." He messed up my hair and laughed. "Alright Smartass. See you later." Em bumped my shoulder. "I'm so proud of you, Aria."

"I love you, Em." Em and I had also had our own talk. And yes there was tons of ice cream involved. She blamed herself for not seeing the signs, realizing it sooner. She felt like she was a failure of a friend. Which made me want to laugh, because I was the one who was the bad friend. We also talked about Ryder. She didn't have anything kind to say about him right now.

Speaking of the devil. He was leaning against his locker at the end of the hallway. I tried my best not to think of him since that night. It was a failed attempt. There were many times I picked up my phone wanting to text him, or just started at it hoping he would text me. Neither happened. Every time my phone was in my hand. I remembered what he said to me at the party.

With a sharp-inhale I forced myself to look away from Ryder. Not wanting to risk making eye contact with him. After a small mental prep-talk I resisted the urge to keep glancing at him. I walked with Em to my locker. As painful as it was. This was the new normal. That chapter of my life is sealed tightly now.

Once we approached my locker. I gave Em a push reassuring her I was fine. She reluctantly listened, giving me a hug bye before going her separate way. Immediately, my insecurities crept up on me. Festering. I was anxious, and a little afraid. Without her support. Without Ry- I mean Andrews support. But it was going to be okay. It's....okay to feel this way. It takes time.

I couldn't help but wonder what people might say to me, or about me. What if it undid some of the healing I had already made progress towards. I was stronger than that right? I could do this.

It wouldn't be easy but it was achievable. My eyes made their way towards my locker. Zack was standing there. Had he been waiting for me? Andrew must have told him that I was coming back today.

Seeing Zack made me angry. Before the party we had come to an understanding. Things would never go back to the way they were before, but we were making progress towards something.

Yet that night he made it all about himself and his agenda. Again. Wanting to punish Ryder for something that happened in the past. Something that had to do with Winter. And he was still using me to do it. Acting like he was doing on my behalf. He hadn't learned his lesson.

I wish I could've told Andrew about what happened between me and Zack. Then maybe he wouldn't be standing here waiting to ambush me. It didn't matter. It was time to face the facts; I was going to cross paths with him sooner or later. Might as well get it over with now.