trouvaille and sunlight

a eulogy from january

a eulogy is meant to praise someone who is already... dead.

i met summer on a rainy night.
none of the umbrellas covered all
the breathless times
i've seen her
ever since i met her.

i've been searching for answers,
how do i make my youth so spontaneous?

and then there was summer.

they say, "a love for the young,
is a love so simple."
not devoting, not scorching.

but summer made me love
like an adult.

a love that is not from the soothing wind,
a love that came from a hurricane.

summer was bathe in solstice,
yet love was foreign to her heart.

can you truly
love someone
to the point
where you can still love them
even if they don't know how to love?

summer was my unending solace,
a drizzle in my month of may
a glimpse
to a home.

i hope i poured her love
that i also
taught her how to love.

"summer, have you ever felt yourself
belonged to january?
summer, have you ever felt yourself
belonged to me?

summer, you left
a town
full of your young memories,
a place where you
danced.

a taste of salt
that is not from the sea
comes from your tears."

in summer's mind,
she died before even
meeting me.
so i never got to hold her heart.

someone with no heart
will love you
till you have given them
your own.

how can you give someone
a eulogy
that is forever engraved in your heart
when she has only died
to you?

- january, the coldest month.