i need you...|a dallyboy story|

its all my fault..

chapter 4-it's my fault...
ponyboys pov
when dal got up to go to the bathroom i looked at his bedside table and i saw the ring he would give his broad.
i honestly forgot him and sylvia broke up, they have been on and off for awhile. he said the only reason he ain't going back to her is because she cheated on him when he was in the cooler
i don't know who would cheat on a guy like dallas winston
i reached over and picked up the ring he stole for a drunk senior
i tried to put it on my middle finger but it was too big, so i put it on my thumb
it was a perfect fit. dal never talks about sylvia anymore. i wonder if he misses her.
i know soda was heartbroken when sandy left him.
he still cries about it sometimes. i cant tell no body that.
dallas walks back in and gives me a strange look
"why are you wearing my ring??" he sounded abit mad. i got kinda scared.
"i-i-m s-sorry" is all i could mutter out
"it's fine pony" "i'm not mad kid,i'm sorry if it sounded like i was, i just wasn't expecting it" i guess he noticed i was kinda scared. he sat beside me on the bed
"i just got curious,i saw it a-and i just wanted to try it on" i still sounded scared, if i'm being honest i'm still scared of dallas, i don't think he would hurt me. 'darry wouldn't let him hurt me' i thought
"no it's fine kid. it looks like it fits you nice" he said, i swear his face turned a light shade of pink and he smiled
"honestly you can wear it if you want" he said as i was taking it off
"really?" i sounded shocked "isn't this the ring you only let your girls wear" i sounded even more shocked
"i mean yeah, but it looks nice on you" he said with a soft smile and grabbing my hand to look at the ring.
i could feel my face heat up.
maybe he is gay.
i'm wearing his shirt,while in his bed. plus he's basically holding my hand.
i'm so confused.
"pon it's getting late" he said yawning and looking at the clock in his bedroom "it's almost 12" he said rubbing his eyes and laying down beside me.
"yeah,i'm getting tired myself" i said yawning and laying down beside dal on my back, we was both on our backs
"pony, can you promise me something" the taller boy says as he turns to face me
"of course" i said turning my head to look at the handsome man
"this is going to sound dumb but promise to never take off the ring. i tell all the broads this" he said sounding like he's half joking
"of course dal" i said half asleep
"i love you dal" i said half asleep not realizing what i said
"love you too kid" he said yawning.
|time skip|
i wake up from an awful bad dream, i started crying at sat up . accidentally waking up the older man.
"pony baby what's wrong" dal said instantly, he sounded worried. he sounded almost like soda. him also sitting up
"i had a bad dream" i let out in between sobs. i normally have had bad dreams before about my parents death. but tonight was different
i had a dream about johnny
"pony come here" he said opening his arms
i instantly moved to hug him, it was kinda awkward because we was sitting down. he moved us to where i was in his lap with my head against his chest, and he was rubbing my back
"do you want to talk about it" the worried boy said
"no" i mumbled out
"okay that's fine, i understand" he said yawning
"can i talk to you about something" i said
"of course pony" dal said
"i have been so stressed. i feel like johhnys death is all my fault. i really wish it would have been me" i sobbed out "i cant tell darry this because i know he's already stressed out and i don't want to make it worse on him and soda he's going through a lot right now as it is and i'm honestly starting to question my sexuality, i know being gay is wrong but i kissed johnny and it felt amazing." i finshed talking
the last bit seemed to take the other male back alittle but he hugged me tightly

"pony johhnys death wasn't your fault, it wasn't anyone's fault, he's in a better place now. i also wish it was me who would have died not johhny. i thought of johhny as my little brother. i promised i would always try and protect him but it didn't work. i finally found the guys that jumped him. but i didn't do anything about it because johnny hated fighting. also kid there nothing wrong with being gay" he said still hugging me, at least dal supports me. he let go and my eyes met with his and i swear his face got so close to mine.
maybe just maybe he's gay but he moved his face away
we layed back down after a random conversation about the gang
i was falling in a deep sleep so i felt his arms wrap around me