Dalumat

XVIII. The Female Gaze

This was good.

Leni was in her usual seat in the van, her handbag that used to be in the middle of the seat was now against the door, and her staff who used to sit beside her was now at the back seats. Empty paper boxes and used wooden utensils surrounded them, as well as half-full paper cups of orange juice, as their vehicle cruised through the completely empty intercity highway.

She laughed freely as the suman malagkit Risa was eating beside her bent itself just as she bit into it, and Leni cupped her hands below Risa's chin to catch the loose half. She didn't have to; it ended up not falling, anyway.

"Akin na mga kamay mo," she said to Risa after she finished, not caring that they weren't alone.

Risa only gave her a quizzical look, but still offered her hands to Leni without saying anything. Leni held them in her own as she cleaned Risa's sticky fingers with wet wipes.

"Gusto mo pa?" she asked, taking her time. "Marami pang natitira if gutom ka pa."

"Leni, grabe ka." Risa laughed. "I'm full na. Tama na."

It was Leni who invited Risa to come with her. After they had left the room and went back to the others, they were supposed to go their separate ways, but before they did, Leni pulled Risa back one more time, telling her, Since pareho naman tayo ng pupuntahan, sama ka na lang sa'kin?

But only if she wanted to, Leni clarified.

To her luck, Risa happily said yes.

When she brought Risa to the van and told her staff that she'd be joining them on their trip, they only gave Leni and Risa a grin and a suspiciously spirited thumbs up.

"Kami, ma'am, gusto pa po namin," one of her staff inserted from the back seat. There was a giggling after, then someone bumping someone on the shoulder, followed by a "Char lang po." Taking it seriously, anyway, Leni took the plastic container with all the suman and handed it to them at the back.

"Mukhang uulan ata," Risa said, as she peered out the window.

Leni looked out, too, and it was true. As the day went on, the bright morning had been replaced by a gloomy afternoon, with dark clouds littering the sky. Her gaze traveled from the window to Risa herself, who, hands now clean and free from Leni, was now sipping juice through a straw. Risa noticed her, saw her looking, then she removed the straw from her mouth and so unabashedly pushed her drink to Leni with an unspoken Gusto mo?

Leni hesitated for a second, but only for a second, and not thinking twice about it, with Risa still holding the drink, Leni bent forward towards Risa and took a sip.

When Leni pulled back, there was a small smile on Risa's face, and Leni would probably sit much closer to Risa, if only they were alone.

Kahit anong iwas ko sa'yo kahapon... dito rin naman mapupunta.

To her surprise, it was Risa who inched closer beside her until their shoulders were almost touching, then she reached down to grasp Leni's thigh, and squeezed it gently.

"Pambawi ko sa'yo," she said.

Leni lightly bumped Risa's arm with her elbow. "Ito naman, sineryoso. Joke lang 'yun."

"Still. Ayokong magtampo ka."

"Hindi naman ako magtatampo. Pwede ka namang umupo kahit saan."

"Pwede nga, pero tititigan mo na naman ako," Risa teased.

"Tinitingnan ko lang kung sa'n ka nakaupo. At saka..."

"Saka?"

"Saka sa'kin ka naman mapupunta sa gabi," Leni said.