With Her

How Can You Help Me If I Can't Help Myself?

I honestly hate school. You get up before the fucking sun is out, get dressed so you look presentable, and sit in the same building with people you hate. It's litteraly like hell on earth and I cant wait untill the day I step out of this place will be the best day of my life.

I grabbed my skateboard and was out the door. I wasn't sure if what happened was spread throughout the school yet, so I was worried about seeing Sam. Maybe she would think less of me or not want to speak to me anymore.

Lets just say it was the longest ride to school on my skateboard ever.

When I got to school everyone was looking at me. Just great. I put my head down and walked to my first class. News of what happened must have spread pretty fast I guess. I had second period with Sam and I was dreading that class today.

I don't know why I actually said something to that girl. It felt right at the time but in reality all I did was draw attention to myself.

The bell rang and it seemed like the clock was going 100 mph. Before I knew it, it was time for second block. I was scared about what Sam would say, but I also didn't know what to say to her. That girl said some pretty odd stuff and I am not really sure if its true. I'm too scared to ask.

As I got to the door I stopped and just stared at it. I was contemplating just faking sick and going home. Although that would make me look like a coward. Before I could make a decision I felt hands on my shoulders. I jumped a little but not much because I knew who it was.

"You just gonna stand here like a deer in the headlights, or are you gonna walk in?" asked Sam.

My face turned bright red and I facepalmed.

"Urrm..yeah." I said too embarrassed to make complete sentences.
I walked in and plopped down into the desk. Sam came and sat next to me, at least she wasn't completely ignoring me.

"So, I heard about what happened yesterday." she stated bluntly.

Fuck.

"Umm...well...I..yeah. I didn't know what came over me I usually just walk away, but that time something snapped and I said something. I probably sounded so stupid. I mean I felt pretty stupid so yeah," I rushed out.

"Why did you feel stupid? And what to you mean 'I usually just walk away'. Have they done this before?"

I sighed, "They haven't but others have. I don't wanna talk about it ok?"

"Okay. You still didn't answer my question on why do you feel stupid."

"I feel stupid because I'm not used to conflict and I didn't know what to say so I probably sounded stupid," I admitted

She laughed, "From what I heard you sounded like you knew how to handle your shit."

I blushed, "Yeah. Right."

"Look. They said some stuff about me and I want you to know its not true. I'm not like that. They were just trying to get into your head. Don't let them."

"You say it like its so easy. Some people can't just push shit from there mind," I replied.

I sighed,"I think I'm just going to head home. I'm not feeling to well."

I decided to not go home just yet because I didn't feel like getting bitched out by my dad. I went to some little ice cream shop called Swirleys and I have to say they have some pretty good ice cream. I am like in love with ice cream so this place was the best discovery ever.

I stayed there for about an hour then went to the park. I found this funny looking tree and sat under it for awhile. I hadnt realized I fell asleep until my phone rang. It was Sam calling and school had just ended. I ignored her call and began to walk home. I wanted to talk to Sam but I was afraid of what she was going to say. I had to pass the school to get to my house and I really did not want to.

I was almost near my house when that little blonde girl came from around the corner. She had two girls with her and I knew exactly what was going to happen. Before I could say any thing they all came at me.

Blondie grabbed me by my hair and threw me onto the floor. Her and one of the other girls started kicking my in the stomach while the other kicked me in the back. One of them got on top of me and began punching me in the face. I was starting to get very fucking angry.

Blonde girl punched me right in the nose and that was it. I grabbed her by her hair and threw her onto the ground. I got on top of her and started punching her in the face just like she had done to me.

All of the sudden someone yanked me off. I was confused because the two girls were by blonde bitches side. I was squirming trying go get out of whosever arms I was in.

"Ryin. Calm the fuck down."

Sam. Of course.

"No. They tried to fucking jump me! I'm tired of people doing this shit!" I shouted.

"What do you fucking mean!?! And no bullshit answer like 'it doesn't matter'. I want the fucking truth," she angrily demanded.

"You want the goddamn truth?! The truth is every fucking where I go I get bullied. Whether its physically or mentally or both! People can never seem to just leave me the hell alone! No matter where I fucking move they find me! So sorry if I'm not willing to share the fact I've been humiliated basically my entire life!"

Sam slowly put me down and I hadn't even realized she had been holding me the entire time. I was shaking really badly and trying to see control my breathing.

"If you would tell someone they could help you with it. If you would have told me I would have helped you with it," she offered.

"How can I expect you, or anyone else to help me if I can't help myself Sam? I'm sorry but your just gonna have to accept the fact that I'm fucked up," I replied.

"If you honestly think any of this is going to push me away from you then your wrong. I really like you Ryin, and until you tell me to stay the hell away from you then I won't."

I blushed and looked to the floor. I didn't know what to do so I just hugged her. She let go and grabbed my hand to take me to her truck.

"Fat bitch," said the blonde asshole.

I went rigid and dropped Sam's hand.

I walked over to the blonde girl and grabbed her shirt, "What the fuck did you just say?"

She smiled evily," I said, Fat. Bi-. "

As soon as she started to say bitch I punched her. She fell to the floor and I leaned over her.

"If you so much as fucking say another word about me I will knock you out. We have obviously seen who would win in a fight so I wouldn't fuck with me. Now take your stupid fake ass and your two little bitches and fucking leave," I demanded.

She scrambled up and pulled her shirt down. She stared at me for a second before turning around and walking away. Good fucking riddiance.

I walked over past Sam and quietly got in her truck. I was tired of all of this bullshit and I just wanted to sleep.
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