It begins with us.

Chapter Nineteen

Ava's POV

The car ride back was awkward and silent, casting my eye's out the window instead of looking towards the man I had given my first kiss to. Truth was that I wanted to kiss him again and again till my fucking lips fell off, but instead, I was avoiding him completely as if I was sitting next to an empty seat beside me instead of the man my heart craved. When our bodies were almost touching, and the look in his eye's when he asked me for a kiss, I honestly thought I was hallucinating, thinking I was imagining the words that dripped from his delicious mouth.

I was in a trance, hypnotized by the way my body was reacting to him that I felt like I would pass out, my mind was dizzy with desire that I felt my body lift onto my toes, my face coming closer as my trembling lips brush his. I felt the most euphoric wave of pleasure pass through my lips as my tongue slipped out and tasted his bottom pout. He then captured my tongue with his lips, sucking on the tip slowly before releasing it and capturing my lips with his.

Blood pounded loudly in my ears while all other sounds were drowned out, feeling my core throb intensely between my legs that I wondered what his mouth would feel like between them. But then the magic had slowly dwindled as the sounds around us hit my ears, making me pull back with a jerk when I realized we were kissing in front of a large crowd. I could feel their eye's on us, and when I turned around to look for a seat, I saw that their gaze was on me, making me feel embarrassed and small. I was guessing that public affection wasn't something people there weren't used to.

I saw the disappointment in his eye's after I pulled away, and my chest tightened to the point where I couldn't stand to look at him. I didn't like seeing him that way but I couldn't help it. I had just had my very first kiss with a man that I feel this powerful connection with, and it was in front of a crowd that was judging me for it.

Suddenly the SUV came to a stop, jerking me out of my thoughts while the car door opened. Mr man bun stood waiting for me to exit, but I turned my head in the direction of Yaakov instead, seeing that he had already exited the vehicle without me. I looked with tears in my eye's as he retreated inside his home, hands buried deep in his pockets as his head was cast down. I had hurt him with my actions, and that sent the most powerful amount of pain to shatter my heart.

"Ms Johnson?"

I snapped my head towards one of my babysitters, quickly wiping my tears away as I exited the vehicle on unsteady legs. My steps were slow and heavy as if I was carrying such a weight on my shoulders that if I had moved any fast, I would fall while it completely crush me.

I walked through the threshold and looked up, wondering if he was waiting for me once I had entered, but nothing. I was all alone in the enormous parlour as my eye's looked in all directions, wondering which way he had gone too and if it was a wise decision to go looking for him. But what would I say? What would he do? He would properly tell me to leave him alone, or ignore me as I had him. Both thoughts blurred my vision as I began to move through the house, clutching the few bags I had in my hands tight to my chest.

"Ms Johnson?"

I stopped mid-step, turning my head as I looked up at man bun. His face gave nothing away as if my pain didn't affect him in the slightest as I waited. I just want to go back to my room, shower and cry myself to sleep, but he was preventing me from doing so.

"Would you like dinner served in your room tonight?"

The gentleness in his voice took me by surprise as I sniffed, wiping my nose on the back of my hand as I nodded yes. I was having my dinners with Rivka and her mother Sofia for the past couple of nights, and the company was quite refreshing, considering the alternative was eating alone. But after having one of the most amazing days of my life, then watching it turn into an utter train wreck because of my actions had drained me completely that I wouldn't be great company in the state I was in.