The Irish's Sanity

Chapter 20

When I first walked in here I wanted to hide behind him, I wanted him to shield me from everything and everyone. I didn't even want to let go of him. I never even thought that I was capable of such feelings but I understood because this was a different environment with different people and he was the only one I knew and trusted - at least I already knew he was beyond redemption to say the least. I appreciated that he didn't force me to do anything. Within a matter of minutes being around them everything changed.

Another reason I was so nervous was because in majority of the books I have read there was always some beef between the mother and the girl and not that I had now resorted into using my sick pleasures to be my guides but - yes I liked to think I might be able to dodge some bullets. I didn't want any beef with anyone I was afraid of making him mad but I also deeply didn't want to associate myself with these people.

As we walked into the fancy room with three chandeliers hanging from above which I was guessing was the dinning room by the large table filled with people, I was already very nervous. I didn't let my eyes wonder neither did I keep them down I strongly felt like they could smell fear and fear made them excited. Lachlan lead us to our seats and then I was forced to look around at the smiling faces as they watched us. I felt small.

As I sat down I was immediately thrusted into the conversation and weirdly it was not about killing people and these people didn't seem like robots. I was expecting stoic dark persona'a with weird looks and glares from the mother and maybe a couple of other people. Welcoming smiles and conversations I didn't know how to handle because I didn't think it was real. I almost felt welcomed.

A weird thing to feel especially already having an idea of the type of people they were. Ironic wasn't it. I thought I would feel out of place and I thought the only thing that would flow through my mind was how I was sitting in a table full of murderers but that wasn't the case. Anyone would have been fooled easily as I watched the people sitting around me of course I was sitting next to the Viking man.

As much as everyone felt... normal I don't make a fuss about it I could feel his eyes on me as if analysing my every move it made me think maybe he was afraid of what I would say around his mother. Maybe she didn't know what he was doing because I knew it definitely wouldn't be his brothers they definitely knew and they didn't care it was none of their business but they loved seeing him - what they claimed as have life in his eyes. -

It was hard to believe that he cared about any ones opinion but then again it was his mother but still it still didn't match Lachlan. And he didn't have any fear in his eyes neither did he look nervous, I wondered if that was actually possible - I don't think he even knows those emotions but instead his eyes just watched me even as he interacted I could tell.

The hope of having something against him felt comforting in the depths of my stomach so I chose to think so. It even lightened my mood. I couldn't for the life of me imagine myself having laverage against the man. If he was keeping this from his mother - did he not want her to know that she raised a monster- did he fear she would also be afraid of him. My mind didn't stop. Bogus -but it didn't stop I found confit in the scenarios.

Even so I didn't know how that would work to my advantage because then if it was so I didn't trust anyone in this room and I would be damned if I started something that would only bring me pain in the future. Even if I had the right cards I had no idea which card to play or whether to play at all. I continued taking time with my food after the maids had served us as I listened to everyone.

They seemed like a some sort of normal family. It didn't make sense. I didn't know what I was truly expecting but it wasn't this. The minute I stepped into this place not even a single person made me feel like I wasn't supposed to be here everyone I have spoken too has made me feel welcomed even though there were comments that sent my stomach in a frenzy but they were all about the Viking man's intentions.