The Irish's Sanity

Chapter 14

The wind brushed against my smooth goosebump apparent skin, the goosebumps weren't because of the wind. I watched before me the man standing by the beautiful scenery. It was a dinner for two set table and I couldn't for the life of me imagine him setting this up. Besides the devilishly handsome Viking man next to it the whole scenery was inviting and peaceful. It just showed that he truly listened and something about that didn't sit right with me.

It brought me a calming sensation which was the opposite of what Lachlan brought me. My hands involuntarily went to the lower part of my stomach where I felt like there was a frenzy. I held my breath the soft material of the dress Lachlan had picked out slowly calming me down. I don't know whether it was the light breeze with the full moon looking over us or the way the table and or everything has been laid out but I was some what calm.

This estate was huge and beautiful although I haven't explored everything what I had seen had been more than mind blowing. The wind brushing against my bandaged hands felt foreign, the bandages have been lessened seeing as the doctor said my wounds were much better than before but I still had a small portion of bandages just around the damaged area. I felt like a street fighter.

I was wearing a long sleeve black dress that hugged my body defining my shape the material wasn't tight to a point where I felt it, it just clung onto my body the right way. It was a low cut long dress and I was wearing heels to go with it. When I saw the outfit I thought we would be leaving but I was really far of. I looked at the way leading to him grateful that I wouldn't have to walk cautiously on the ground afraid that the heel of my shoes would poke through the ground.

I was scared of sitting here all night with him, I was afraid of my tongue involuntarily shutting down on me and I would be left to face him. I couldn't risk that; the pure fear I felt for the man was no joke. The past few weeks have been nothing but difficult as I tried to adjust to him. And he hasn't even been here that much, him not being here helped me greatly -mentally and I seemed to be healing at a faster rate even the wounds on my back were much better now.

I wonder why he would even begin to care enough - I didn't understand I felt I knew him better than when I first got here Lachlan doesn't do anything without thinking it through. I do remember saying something about an outdoor dinner in one of our late night conversations but I didn't think he took everything I said seriously or for that matter would remember. My eyes trailed to the man of my nightmares. No matter how many times I try and train myself to not think about what he has done to me I fail looking at him right now. I took deep breaths as I watched him move towards me.

He installed an incandescent dimmer in his room because he knew I wasn't fond of the dark and especially since I got here, the nightmares I had were caused by him. I've been through some hard times in my life but I've never been this disturbed. The image of him beating Liam's skull in lived in my mind rent free. I couldn't understand who in their right mind would do that to someone or how another human being would do that to someone else, I wasn't oblivious of the world but this wasn't something one quickly could get over.

I had also tried by all means to suppress the memory of what he did to me but it was very hard to seeing as my wounds were a constant reminder they hadn't been fully healed so they would bleed if they were handled the without caution of any sort at that time and I was sure I would have a scar I would have to bare forever there, the doctor said they would be able to get rid of the scars on my back with rays easily a treatment I was more than sure was costly but I doubted that that would even begin to dent the Viking man's pockets in the slightest ways, the doctor also said for the scars that would form on my hands we would have to wait and see how the scarred tissue was before she formed any type of conclusion.

Above all that every time Lachlan returned for that short period of time he would look at me the way he looked at me the first time he saw me. It was stomach turning, and quite frankly petrifying. I had hoped he would have been tired of me at this time.  The only thing which seemed to help me was him on these trips and him and I speaking on the phone which wasn't an option for me I didn't ask but I knew it wasn't. The space gave me freedom to think and breathe. And make myself realise the reality of this situation. Him getting tired of me and discarding me was my best chance at getting away from him but that spark of hope seemed to dimmer every single day.