Fat Funny Famous

Chapter 1

A new story!  A first chapter!  How exciting!

For those of you who have been reading my tales for a while, you'll know that I like to start with an author's note, mostly because I love reading author's notes myself.  Hearing from the person behind the keys, understanding why they chose to write this particular book, it's like being part of the process - but feel free to skip ahead if you prefer :)

I've written several books now with larger body sizes (The Curves Ahead, How to Lose Weight and Survive the Apocalypse) and I truly believe these kinds of stories are important.  For about a million years, all romance heroines have been portrayed as thin, white, able-bodied cis-women.  That's great if you are a thin, white, able-bodied cis-woman - but what about the rest of us?  Having romantic protagonists who are people of colour or are LGBTIQA+ community members or have mental health challenges or disabilities is absolutely vital to normalise more than one kind of 'acceptable' romance. Wattpad is a brilliant place for finding stories by writers from all walks of life - feel free to drop some recommendations in the comments below (even if it's your own story!)

And as for women who aren't a size zero - oo boy, do we get left behind in the romance department - in books, on TV, on the big screen.  A funny fat guy with a super hot wife is practically the staple of every sitcom and a bunch of romcoms too.  But a larger woman is almost always the sidekick, the hilarious best friend, the sexless mentor, the mean mother, the butt of cheap jokes about weight.  Rarely is she the love interest, shown enjoying her body, as someone to be desired.

Why does this matter?  Because much as we all hate to admit it, we're conditioned into believing what is attractive by what we're told by society is attractive.  For example, in Ancient Greece, the unibrow was seen as super sexy - a sign of great intelligence and beauty.  Now, most women I know would rather lick a public toilet seat than be seen with stray eyebrow hairs above the bridge of their nose.  But eyebrows aren't inherently sexy or unsexy - it's only what our culture deems attractive at that moment.

So, here's to normalising romantic stories with bodies of all sizes!  Here's to fat protagonists who don't have to go through a makeover journey to get the man!  Here's to celebrating everything that makes us different while acknowledging that the things that truly matter, like love, friendship and kindness, are present in us all.

Much love and thanks for reading,

Kate

Jan 2023

"Who are you?" I ask, swiping angrily at the tears that roll freely down my cheeks. The wind whips my long hair around my face; it looks like a living creature, raging along with me at the unfairness of the situation.

"I'm who you've always known," he says, reaching for my hands. "I'm the man who loves you."

"I love you too," I whisper. "But it's not enough."

I watch tears rise in his eyes and a sob escapes me. There's nothing left to say, no more lines. I wait for someone to say cut, to save me from this moment, but only the wind speaks, wailing in our ears as we drift apart.

*

Ugh, I need someone to save me from this moment... I braced myself for the verbal battle ahead and said in my most serious theatre-director voice, "I just want to start by saying that I really do respect your creative vision. But, Jack, I have to say that I just don't believe Flounder was part-unicorn."

Jack gazed at me with all the wisdom of his eight years on this planet, adjusted the sparkling rainbow unicorn headband atop his dark hair, and replied, "But Mila... We can't know the true origins of Flounder. He's a talking fish! He's magical! He could totally be the long lost child of a unicorn king, destined to forever roam the seas as the lowly assistant to an annoying mermaid."