Langhua: The Codependence of a Prince and His General

Grudge

Even if Hua Yuheng might hate him, even if he was terrified...

He still wanted to see him.

He wanted to talk to him. He wanted Hua Yuheng to look at him.

That was the one part of what his mother said yesterday that he could understand.

Xuanyuan Lang closed the ten-step distance to the bars and gripped the wood tightly. His hand was just small enough to squeeze through the bars, even if the splinters knicked his wrist as he reached out to Hua Yuheng.

Hua Yuheng was huddled in a far corner, not moving.

If his hand could not reach him, then he would make sure his voice would.

"Ah Heng!" At this point, Xuanyuan Lang did not care if the guards could hear him anymore. Everyone knew that they were friends now, anyway. "Ah Heng, look at me!

"I know you can hear me!

"I'll keep yelling until you answer me!

"I'm not going anywhere!"

"...Shut up." The bundle in the corner moved. Hua Yuheng somehow looked even worse than he did yesterday, and when their eyes met, Xuanyuan Lang felt his heart tremble. It was difficult to not look away.

But he didn't.

He held eye contact for as long as he could, willing himself to melt the hard barrier that had fallen over Hua Yuheng's eyes. Three years, and most recently a month that probably felt like forever to him. It was hard to associate these cold, hard eyes with the boy Xuanyuan Lang remembered meeting all that time ago, and even harder to connect them to the friend he had been exchanging letters with, whose words he pored over and waited for and read to himself countless times.

Even so...

"I'm glad to see you again." The words Xuanyuan Lang had wanted to say yesterday finally left his lips.

Hua Yuheng gave a harsh, mirthless bark. "In this sorry state?"

"Yes." Xuanyuan Lang let his emotion leak into his voice. "I'm sorry to say this. I know it's not the right time and you probably hate me right now, but I... I'm glad we could meet again." He lowered his head, breaking contact to hide the glistening in his eyes. "Truly."

There was a long, long silence... eventually punctured by a weary sigh.

"Qilang." Hua Yuheng's voice was soft but hoarse. He sounded so much older, in a way that made Xuanyuan Lang's heart vaguely frantic. "Why are you even here?"

It was not a question. Xuanyuan Lang sat down at the bars, ignoring how the dirty prison floor might stain his robes. Right now, he just wanted to be as close to Hua Yuheng as he could, and he said so wordlessly. As he kept his head down and waited, he eventually heard a reluctant rustle in the hay. After a moment, he saw Hua Yuheng's feet in front of him, less than two steps from the bars.

"I didn't want you to see me like this," Hua Yuheng said softly as he crouched down. "I—Wait, are you crying?"

"I'm not!" Xuanyuan Lang protested, but the dusty stone floor betrayed him. There were two darker spots amidst the grey, perfectly round and annoyingly obvious. Xuanyuan Lang rubbed his eyes furiously, smearing more dust across his face and sleeves.

"Between the two of us, why are you the one who's crying right now?" There was an edge of exasperation in Hua Yuheng's voice. Xuanyuan Lang's head whipped up just in time to see what might have been a ghost of a smile, but it was gone as soon as he thought he caught it. Was he imagining it? This time, he looked away quickly so Hua Yuheng could not see how red his eyes were.