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Pan!NB!Reader x Hanako

This is a request from: TherapistAndTBHKfan

Thank you for the request

⚠️ Depictions of self-harm, dead naming, homophobia and such ⚠️

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You drew out a heavy sigh and looked up into the mirror. You felt comfort at the sight of your much shorter, deep red hair. You felt ready. Ready to tell everyone who your really were.

A banging sounded from the other side of the bathroom door and you flinched. 

"[Dead Name]! Are ya done!? Some of us need to use the bathroom, too, y'know?" Your mother shouted from the other side.

"Y-yeah! I'll be right out!" You replied in a hurry. The banging ceased and you heard your mother mumble as she walked away. You sighed, took one more deep breath, and looked back into the mirror.

It'll be okay. I'm ready.

You slowly cracked the door open and slipped outside, making your way out to the living room where the rest of your family sat.

You cleared your throat in the doorway, turning heads. Your father's jaw dropped and your mother stood up abruptly.

"[Dead Name]... Your hair! What on earth did you do to yourself!?" She shrieked in horror, rushing up and messing with your new hair. Some dye stained from your hair to her fingertips. She wiped her hands on her pants in disgust.

"Please don't call me that..." You spoke timidly. Your mom grimaced.

"What do you mean? You're [Dead Name]. That's the name I gave to you when you were born. What, you don't like it all of a sudden?" She scoffed, her hand limply gesturing to you.

"Yes, yes, I know. But I want to be called [Name]. I'm pansexual and nonbinary... And I want to go by [Pronouns]."

Your mother scowled as your father joined her with disgust.

"This is outrageous! You're deranged, that's what! No child of mine will participate in such actions. You can accept things as they are or leave."

You gulped in fear. Your hands turned clammy and your heartbeat sped up. Should you really reject who you are or be homeless? Your thoughts raced and wouldn't stop, no matter how many times you counted to ten.

"Tomorrow," your mother finally said. You looked up in confusion. "You have until tomorrow before you're out. You are no longer my child." You winced at her sharp tone and retreated to your room.

You stayed hidden in there for the rest of the night. You didn't go out for dinner, too busy packing your things- including your razor. Real family would accept you regardless of gender, sexual orientation or even hair. You furrowed your brows as you stuffed more clothes into a duffel bag, feeling tears build up in your eyes. It was painful having to leave your own family; the people who were supposed to look out for you and comfort you and help you. And you didn't even bother telling yourself it would all be alright this time.

---

The following day, you left to school early. Hours early. You were in your uniform and had your duffel bag slung over your shoulder as you crept out of the house.