Crashed

III

Zoë

I haven't seen him race in ages. I never wanted to join when he got into Formula 1. I went one time, because my parents insisted. The atmosphere was magical, the buzzing around everyone, the focus of the drivers and the teams, the hectic period before the race in the garage. It was enchanting. It made me hate racing even more. But it made me realize I missed karting, wishing it was me in that Formula 1 car. I was never able to get this far, hence why I stopped karting as well. Eric has tried to call me several times but I ignored him. He will never make this right again, no matter how many times he apologizes to me. 

I walk into the paddock again with his family. I'm a little hesitant about all the cameras. I see them fixed on us. His girlfriend takes my hand. "I'll show you around, come on! You'll enjoy it." She's a sweet girl, or woman I must say. "And here we have our hospitality and across the garage. He'll be in a meeting right now before he needs to get out in free practice. Fancy getting a coffee?" I nod at her. We go sit in the hospitality together. "So I know we don't know eachother very well and it's not really my place but-..." "He cheated on me. Eric cheated on me with my best friend. And I think they've done that for a very long time. His stupid 'lads day' was just a cover to fuck her right under my nose without me suspecting anyting. I found out a few days ago, I just drove around and happened to get to my parents house where I found your parents in law at the table. She immediatly saw something was wrong, I mean I had cried my eyes out on the way there, I can't really say I looked happy. And she invited me to join everyone for this weekend and now I'm here, telling you my sad life story. Cheers." She looks at me and takes my hand. "Well I hope this weekend makes you forget about everything a little bit. I'm so sorry this happened to you." I smile at her. 

He comes back from his meeting. "I have to go to the garage now. Do you want to join and see everything there?" I nod and follow him in silence. "Are you enjoying today?" "So far it's okay, I haven't seen any racing yet. That would be nice." "Well prepare yourself, training isn't that much of excitement. Tomorrow would be fun tho, I remember you liked qualifying better than the race itself if that's still correct." He looks questiongly at me. He is correct, I think the Saturdays are more fun to watch. I nod and smile at him. "When was the last time you came along on a raceweekend?" "It was a European race in your first year." "Oh I remember, Spa right?" I nod. It stays silent again. "Well I have to get in the car now, feel free to take a pair of headphones and chill here if you want." He gets in his car and drives off. God, I would do anything to get in that car now. 

Him

She joined today to watch practice. I showed her around the garage. She had a smile on her face so I think she enjoyed herself. Today is qualifying. The rest of my family comes later, they're not going to watch fp3, but Zoë wanted to watch on her own. I take her with me in the car. I want to ask her what happened that she's so sad and we start at the same time with talking. She smiles at me. "Go ahead." she tells me. "Can I ask you what happened? I mean you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." She starts fidgetting with her fingers. "Well all I can say is that I'm single again." She smiles sarcastically and I can see the pain in her eyes. "I'm sorry to hear that. I really liked Eric." "Yeah I did too." She looks out the window and I can see her wipe away a tear. I decide not to ask any further. "So you joined to get your mind off of things?" "Something like that." I nod. I know something that will make her feel better. "Why don't we go karting together on Monday, just like old times?" I nudge her and she has a vague smile "Yeah that would be cool." "Don't cry too hard when you loose."I joke at her. She laughs "Sorry I will drive slow for you, don't want to hurt your feelings." "Ouch Zo, not my feelings." "I'm still a way better driver than you are, no doubt about that." "Don't get all cocky, I'm driving in Formula 1 for a few years now."

We arrive in the paddock. I have to go to my team and leave her behind. She's just sitting on her own in the hospitality. I sigh. I'm trying my best to be nice to her, especially now I know she feels heartbroken. But it is so hard to be around her and be nice. Things will never be the way they used to be. I walk with her to the garage. "You want to sit in my car when I'm done?" Her eyes light up. "Really, can I do that?" "Well, I'm the first driver, they practically never say no to me. So if we ask nicely and you flash them with your sweetest smile, it will be all good. But after practice." She flies around my neck. "Thank you!" I don't know what to do for a second. It's like time is frozen. She pulls back and awkwardly looks away. At that moment we get interrupted. "Hello mate, hello stranger." "Hey Lan, eh this is Zoë. An old friend of mine that came along for the weekend." He looks at her. She greets him. "Why don't you go ahead into the garage and I see you in a bit." I tell Zoë and she leaves the conversation. "Damn, if all your old friends are this hot, take them along anytime you want." "Off limits Lando." "Oh I get it, you were more than just friends. I completely understand, she's smoking hot." I roll my eyes at him. "Yeah see you on track." "Is she coming to the party on Sunday?" "I don't know, I'll ask her." "I hope you do Maximilian!" Why is my blood boiling?