Trust

Chapter Thirteen

Trevante Rhodes

I'd been walking through campus, heading back to my room. I was pretty sure Lichelle and DeMarcus might be there, but I was tired and the last thing I cared about was the lovebirds having more time with each other. I couldn't even hold onto my little birdie.

I'd been thinking of Shakyra non-stop and the thoughts were making me borderline depressed. It was like I told my boys earlier, I never cared for Wendell. Not even a little bit. There might've been some respect back in high school but that diminished quickly over the case of Ms. Smalls. I didn't totally understand his presence on the campus other than to be a bane. His annoyance for me was pretty confusing because I honestly played my position the way I was supposed to...for the exception of one time but Shakyra had put me in my place years ago. She caused my respect for her to grow in that moment, making me realize that she was nothing like any other woman I'd dealt with. Still, as it came directly to Wendell, I did nothing for son to hate on me.

I witnessed it the first time in the summer. His words had been harsh and his delivery harsher. The first time they broke up however, I saw the sadness in her eyes when I pulled up to her house Christmas night years ago. I had wanted with my entire being to hold her in my arms while she recited the poetry in the book that I bought her.

Really, just to hold her. To provide that comfort. To show her that I wasn't after out doing a soul because I knew it was a privilege to even breathe her air. DeMarcus didn't matter to me. Wendell didn't matter to me. I didn't come with a bevy of issues to lay on her chest. I...just wanted to love her. I wanted to spoil her. I wanted to allow her to forget it all even happened. I wanted to make certain movements on her behalf but felt stunted and stilted. There wasn't much I could do but wait.

What if waiting for her was in vain?

I was almost at my building when I saw her walking towards me. I felt my smile spread because as usual, she was a joy to look at. That was until she approached closer and I saw sadness in her eyes again. My own brows furrowed, and I was about to ask her what was wrong when she lifted up my hands, cutting me off.

"Did you know?"

I blinked and asked her what she was talking about.

"Did you know about Lichelle and DeMarcus? How long it's been going on? Did...did you know about it Trevante?"

Her eyes started to water, and it hurt me more than words could say to nod to her in the positive.

"Yeah, sweetheart..."

She lifted her hand, shaking her head and started to walk past me. I blocked her.

"Hear me out, please." I said, watching her shake her head furiously, "Please."

"Nah, because everybody else knew and I'm just out here looking stupid. I'm out here trying to be the bigger person in all of this bullshit, and this is how y'all niggas do me. Fuck you, fuck Boogie, fuck Lichelle, fuck Kofi, fuck Justine, fuck all y'all. Somebody could've said something, the fuck?"

"Shakyra."

She paused her tirade to look at me. The look in her eyes hurt and I wasn't even sure whether to keep pushing or not.

"Baby...how would it have been right for anybody other than Lichelle or Boogie to come to you with this shit? Like maybe a couple years ago I could've said something, but this is my nigga! I promise, it hurt to keep this from you, but I couldn't very well just air it out like that. If it was you and Kiki, you gonna just air it out?"