Aalayah and the Stars

Chapter 6

Aalayahs pov:

After what happened at Zara's daycare last week, the woman, true to her word, called my mom who of course came to dads house and berated me.

Since then I have been so devastatingly exhausted that I haven't even made it around to taking Zara to daycare.

We've been laying in bed everyday, snuggling and watching cartoons, only getting up to do something sort of productive when Zara gets hungry.

Usually this sort of thing helps me, like a reset week to get my mental health under control, only this time it's not getting better. It's getting worse.

I haven't eaten a full meal since the fight with my mom, which I'm sure isn't great for my recovery but I just can't bring myself to muster up the energy to eat when I'm feeling so mentally drained.

It feels like I've been this way forever.

"Sissy", a little voice calls to me from my bedroom door way, drawling me out of my thoughts. "Yeah?" I respond as I turn my head to look at Zara.

"Im hungry." Of course you are, when are you not? I think to myself. Sighing as I get out of bed, I walk over to her, smoothing her messy hair down when I reach her.

Walking out of my room, as were making our way to the kitchen I look at the framed photos littered all over the walls. I see a picture of myself, I couldn't be any older than 10.

The genuine smile on my face makes me feel the utmost envy for who I used to be before the mental illnesses had developed. Before everything got so bad.

I hate looking at pictures of happier times, it makes me realize just how fucked up I am.

As I feel my eyes begin to burn in hatred toward myself, I inhale and exhale deeply, trying to get my emotions under control before I start crying.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I walk into the messy kitchen and head to the fridge.

"What do you want, Zara?" I ask before answering the question for her, "frozen pancakes"? She shakes her head, causing me to exhale deeply praying she doesn't pick something that involves actual work.

"I want an omelette, please." I groan as the 10 pound weight that has been plaguing my body begins to feel like a hundred pound weight.

Sighing, I grab the egg carton and a couple slices of cheese. My eyes begin to burn all over again, pure exhaustion making me feel sluggish and sad. I make my way over to the stove and grab a frying pan from the drying rack.

I light the stove and place the pan atop the burner. Cracking a few eggs in the pan, I season it with salt and pepper, and begin swirling the eggs around.

Listening to the sounds of crackling eggs and crayons coloring on paper, I begin to zone out, thinking about the fight between me and mom last week.

(Slightly abusive content)

"Are you kidding me, Aalayah? Are you fucking kidding me right now." Mom raises her voice at me, my throat tightening and my heart beat speeding up.

"You pushed a 5 year old?! Are you so stupid that you do not see the fault in that?!" My eyes begin to tear up as I'm quick to defend myself, "He smacked Zara hard, Mom."

"You are incredible, Aalayah." Mom mutters under her breath, sounding in disbelief as she shakes her head and does the little chuckle she does when she is pissed "He is five, Aalayah, five!" She yells at me again, making me violently flinch away from her, as she comes closer.

"Do you know how embarrassing it is when I've got some random lady calling me telling me that my teenager has just pushed a 5 year old?" She says through gritted teeth, her voice level before she raises it again, "Huh?!"

Tears stream down my face, "I'm sorry," my voice cracking, "I was having a bad day" I sob out.

SMACK!

The sound of something dropping onto the floor pulls me out of my thoughts, as I look back and see Zara bending down to pick up her crayon box that must've fallen off the table.

I turn back to the omelette and place the cheese on top, and wait a moment for it to melt some, and then fold the omelette over.

I flip the omelette and then remove it and place it on a plate.

Turning off the stove and putting everything away, I bring the plate over to Zara and sit down in the chair next to hers.

"Thanks sissy!" Zara says enthusiastically with a grateful smile. "You're welcome" I mumble back as I slightly smile at her.

I look down at the paper she colored. It was a page out of one of my paw patrol coloring books, a page of rubble to be exact.

"You did a good job coloring rubble, I couldn't color that good if I tried", I say as I smile at her. Zara giggles, "Thanks sissy, maybe some day you can color as good as me".

Laughing at that, a genuine smile crosses my face before Zara asks when she's going back to day care, making my smile drop instantly.

"Soon. When do you want to go back?" I ask her, my voice quiet. She takes a bite of her omelette and responds, talking with her mouth full, a big ick of mine.

"Tomorrow." She says, sounding chipper. I nod my head, and exhale deeply. "Tomorrow it is then."

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A/N-  Not edited.

Guys.. this is one for the books. I actually wrote this just now and am publishing it not long after being wrote. Usually it sits in my notes for weeks lol.

Also, sorry if I totally messed up how to make an omelette, Ive never made, or had one lmfao. I literally looked it up on YouTube. 🤣😭

THANKS FOR READING! BYEEEEEE! 😽❤️