psithurism

i: a duchess without a duke

"Welcome to the Vandecois Mansion, Your Grace." I forded a smile to the old man who greeted me the moment I entered the duchy. "I am Juandre Hall, the Head Butler of the mansion."

"N-Nice to meet you, Sir Juandre," I said.

The old man smiled sweetly at me. "Juandre is fine, Your Grace."

I scratched my nape. "H-How dare I?"

I heard him sigh. "Then do what makes you comfortable." He beckoned to a handmaid behind him and the young lass curtsied at me. "Your Grace, this is Elle. She will be your personal servant. She will escort you to your chamber. I shall take my leave now. Make yourself comfor-"

"Sir Juandre," I stopped him when he was about to leave. The old man gave me a patient smile while waiting for me to talk. I cleared my throat before opening my mouth to speak. "W-Where is my h-husband?"

I saw how the servants around us stiffened and averted their gazes. I looked around the mansion and the dull interior of the mansion greeted me.

My husband didn't even bother to greet me.

"His Grace is busy at the moment, Madame. I'm sure he will find time to meet the duchess some other day."

That is always his excuse.

"Sir Juandre, I'm going to attend the banquet hosted by the Empress to celebrate a healthy childbirth. Is the duke not gonna company me?" I asked.

The old man gave me a sympathetic smile. I had been married to the duke for a year but not even once did I saw his shadow.

"His Grace is busy at the moment and couldn't attend the party. However, he prepared a gift for the newborn prince," he said and beckoned to a knight holding a box.

I forced a smile. "T-Then I shall head to the palace. Is the carriage ready?"

"Yes, Your Grace."

It took almost three hours for us to reach the palace. Elle helped me get off the carriage while two ducal knights escorted us.

"Duchess Naomi Lirham-Vandecois had arrived!" a knight announced and the stares of the people immediately went to me.

"She came alone again."

"I admire her shamelessness."

"She is truly unfavored by her husband."

"I met with the duke the other day and he told me he only marrieth her because she's the payment of her family's debt."

"Is that true? You met with His Grace. You're so lucky, Lady Antoinette!"

I clenched my fist hearing what the nobles are discussing about.

I forced a smile when I saw the empress holding the prince. I curtsied when I arrived in front of her. That's when I noticed the emperor standing beside her. He has a stoic expression but his arm is wrapped possessively around the empress.

"Glory upon the Imperial Couple," I said sweetly and looked at the adorable sleeping prince. "Congratulations for the healthy childbirth, Your Majesty. I brought a gift for our new star from the Vandecois duchy." I beckoned to Elle who was carrying the present.

She smiled sweetly at me. "You shouldn't have bothered, duchess," she said and signaled to a handmaid.

"This way to the presents, please."

I let Elle followed the maid while I stayed to have a little conversation with the empress.

"Warren sure has the guts to not attend a special occasion." I shivered when I heard His Majesty's cold voice.

I looked down. "I-I apologize in behalf of my h-husband-"

"Has my brother still not showed himself to you?"

I was taken aback when the empress asked me. Fortunately the orchestra is playing a symphony that no one heard of our conversation. I smiled bitterly. "I could consider myself a widow."

I saw how pity crossed her eyes. "Please pardon my brother, duchess."

I could only nod.

I quietly dismissed myself when other guests came to greet the Imperial Couple.

I was eating a mousse cake when a lady sat in front of me.

"Is if true that you haven't seen the duke's face?" she asked.

I gulped. How did they know? "W-Where did you heard of such nonsense?" I asked.

The lady scoffed in front of me. "Lady Antoinette Ancouive said so."

"W-Why would you b-believe her-"

"A rumor is spreading around the capital about your husband's affair with her." What she said was like a bomb that destroyed my town. "Have you not heard the hearsays?" Her tone was concerned but there's a glint of mischievousness in her eyes. She stood up and looked at me mockingly. "Guard your husband, Your Grace." She then gasped and open her handfan to cover her mouth. "But can you when you hasn't even seen the duke's face? Are you even elligible to be called his wife?"

The lady left and I was left alone in the table. I looked around and that's when I noticed that everyone's attention was on us.

They're now giving me judgemental stares and all I could do was look down. I excused myself and left the party early, not being able to bear the pressure of their eyes.

"Your Grace?" Sir Juandre asked when I arrived at the mansion early.

I forced a smile at him. "I'm tired, Sir Juandre," I said. "I'll rest early today."

I didn't wait for him to reply. I headed straight to the second floor of the mansion where my chamber is at.

I halted when I walked past the stairs to the third floor. I looked at the grand staircase before I averted my gaze and sighed.

The duke's office and chamber is at the third floor. I had never been there because I'm forbidden to. More like I forbid myself to do so.

What is it like up there? What if I-

I shook my head and immediately went to my chamber. I would never dare to step foot there.

If His Grace doesn't want me there, I won't go to that place.

***