𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖑𝖊𝖘𝖘 - 𝖂𝖊𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖉𝖆𝖞 𝕬𝖉𝖉𝖆𝖒𝖘

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕿𝖜𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖞 - 𝕺𝖓𝖊

"The heart wants what it wants - or else it does not care." - Emily Dickinson

I sit here on the steps, in the cold shivering a bit. I could've gone inside a long time ago, but the way she was running so fast.

Why was she in such a hurry? Did something happen? Is it about the monster? Is someone hurt? Is she still alive?

I guess my answer to that last question just got answered, she's alive. She walks towards me, sitting down next to me on the steps.

"Are you okay?" I question, she looks fine but looks sad.

"Eugene, was attacked," I don't know Eugene at all. I only know that he's very shy, and doesn't have any friends besides his bees and Wednesday.

"Is he alive?"

"He's in a coma. It's all my fault," she buries her head in her hands. She starts sniffling, trying to hold back tears.

"It's not your fault," I pull her close to me. Letting her bury her head in my chest.

"If I would've gone to the woods with him as planned, none of this would've happened," she cries. It probably wouldn't have happened, but I'm not going to say that.

"You didn't know that."

"I should've known."

I don't answer, it's sad that she blames herself for all of this. This isn't her fault, and never will be.

When you blame yourself to much, for everything. You'll start drowning in guilt, guilt is painful it's something you live with your entire life.

Guilt is a burden, it keeps you up at night, makes you dream. It gives you dark circles under your eyes and bloodshot pupils. Makes you lose your appetite, because instead of eating you're thinking of what you've done.

"Did you enjoy tonight, besides Eugene being hospitalised?"

"It was fine I guess? You?" I hate this small talk.

"Horrible," it was truly awful. I sigh, looking down. Wednesday is looking at my side profile. I want to know what she's thinking, her mind must be so interesting.

"Sorry, about what Tyler did to you last year," what the fuck did her tell her?

"What did he tell you?" I ask.

"He told me he used to harass you and Xavier and Zella, a lot. About the mural."

"He did way worse things than paint over a mural," I scoff. That mural was just the beginning, that wasn't that special. I don't know why Xavier went to all this trouble to bad mouth Tyler, with the least concerning and mean action he did. Could he not say anything more, I don't know? Mean? That happened.

"What did he do?"

"That's a long story."

"What did he do?"

"He and his friends harassed me. We fought, it's whatever," why am I trying to play it down?

"Fought?"

"Yes, uhm I was arrested for that. Even though I was the one bleeding," I mumble.

Some people will think by fighting, that I mean fist fighting. Not really that. Mostly verbally, sometimes physically.

I am a good fighter, I guess. My father taught me martial arts. But after every fight you'll get something to remember it by, something permanent or something temporary. A bruise, a scar, a wound, a scratch.

"Is he the reason you have that scar?"

"Yes," I hesitate saying it. Why I don't know. I don't want to talk bad about him, if she likes him. I guess.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I thought you liked him," she gets a disgusted look on her face. She doesn't? "He was your date?"

"I didn't invite him, he just showed up," who does that? That's ew. "I was going to go to the monster's lair."

"You found the lair?"

"I also found some evidence. You might get mad at me for this, but I asked the police to do a dna test on some of Xavier's blood."

"I really don't want it to be him."

"Also I didn't just ask you to the dance, because I think you might be behind this," she stands up. I get up to, looking at her. "It's just I don't know how feelings and emotions work, definitely not love. I'm very scared of it, I try to avoid it at all costs. That's why I've been distant from you for the past week or two. I tried to exterminate every feeling of love, I wasn't comfortable with it. So I lied to you that day, because I was scared."

"So what are your true feelings?" she looks down at my lips, and looks back up to my eyes.

It turns out I wasn't living in my own delusion.

We look into each other's eyes for a second, before leaning in. Our lips touch, and everything feels perfect.

Her lips are soft and sweet. I missed her on my lips, my lips ached for her. Her lips and the taste of them are a remedy. They taste like my new addiction.

This is perfect, the stars shining brightly, and the moon coloured a beautiful white.

Her lips pressing into me, my hands moving up and down her back. My right hand making its way to her hair.

Her hands gripping my blazer, pulling me closer. We pull apart, she smirks.

Please, kiss me like that again.

"Should we have a little the Rave'N do-over?"

"What does that entail?" I give her my hand, she puts hers in mine. I twirl her around, we dance to the imaginary music.

We dance beneath the stars, while looking deeply into each other's eyes.

Can we stay like this forever?

My hand goes from her waist to the back of her neck, I kiss her deeply, poetically, hungry.

Oh, her eyes are the prettiest love letters. No one has ever read, besides me. In this moment.

The sparkle in those eyes and the beautiful madness that is her brain.

Is this what love feels like?

If it is, I want to live in this moment forever. Let me turn back time and relive a thousand times, until I get bored, which is impossible.

I walk her to her room and kiss her goodnight.

Yes, this is love.