Opposites Attract | BUNNY (mostly) One-shots

Pretending in STYLE (pt. 1)

(This takes place in middle school)

"What the..."

The four stared at a single poster on the wall, the letters on the top read Kyman (Cartan x Kyle).

Kyle was fuming. "Is this one of your sick jokes again, Cartman?!" He shouted, stomping over to him.

Cartman shook his head. "Did you!?"

"Obviously not! Why the hell would I ship myself with your fata$s!?"

"Shut up Jew!"

Kenny and Stan watched them argue from the sidelines. "Maybe Kyle is a Tsundere!" Kenny suggests while laughing, Stan just shakes his head.

"Guys! Don't you guys remember? It was those asian girls who made the art!" Stan said to try to stop their arguing, which kind of worked. Keyword: Kinda.

"Ooooh right." Everyone agreed.

Kyle cleared his throat. "Well- How do we stop it? We can't possibly pretend to break up like Tweek and Craig. I just wouldn't be able to handle it." Everyone put their hand to their chin to indicate that they were thinking.

"GUYS! Guys! Did you see-" Butters ran over to the four and sees the poster and Kyle glaring at him.

"Bad time...?"

"YES." Kyle said sassily. Butters scratched the back of his head shyly. Butters twirled around to leave, but then Stan stopped him.

"Butters, do you have any ideas for.. Trying to make Kyman seem bad? But not something that would make any of them look like the bad guy!" Stan asked in favor of Kyle.

Butters thought for two minutes or so before answering, "Maybe try to.. Pair one of the two up with someone else?" He shrugged. The four stared at Butters then at each other.

"Okay, uhm. Thanks." Kyle thanked with a sour look. Butters hesitantly nodded, and waltz out.

When Butters was out of view, the group huddled together. "Okay, so, we're definitely not shipping ANYONE with the fata$s." Stan stated, everyone nodded.

Cartman, who clearly heard, detested, "Heeey, stop calling me fat guys!" Kyle rolled his eyes.

"Either Kyle x Kenny or Me x Kyle. You get to choose, dude. But we'll still be in the friends status, right Ken?" Stan explained, Kenny agreeing and pulled out a thumbs-ups to reassure Kyle.

Kyle glanced at the two of them, his cheeks starting to heat up. Hey wait, didn't Stan have a girlfriend? Why was he making himself a choice? Kyle thought about it a little more, and decided to shrug it off. Stan was the one who offered himself anyway, so he would have to be ready for the consequences for it.

"Stan. I choose Stan." Kyle declared, his head hung low because of embarrassment. His face was practically red as his hair, which was the main reason why he wasn't doing eye contact.

Cartman snickered, "Gays."

They ignored Cartman's comment, and continued to talk about their plan. "Since we still haven't planned out the plan and we still have classes.. We could think of other ways, for now this plan is going to be plan B. If none of our ideas work out by Friday or Thursday, we'll see how the plan plays out." Even though Stan himself had said no hard feelings (in a way), he couldn't help but blush.

*BRIIIIIIIING!*

The group groans at sound of the bell, clearly not wanting to go to class. But eventually they separated, giving each other goodbyes.

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Kyle trudged the hallways to the meeting spot where his group usually meets. There were practically bags starting to appear from the sleepless nights. Everywhere he looked, there were posters, or people staring at him and whispering about something.

None of their plans worked. The more the days past, the more posters appeared.

"Ughhhh, I'm going to fvcking kill myself."

Damn, all this affected him that much? Okay, that's kinda sad. I feel tremendously bad for him. Now you might be thinking, but YOU'RE the author! You literally write the stories! Well guess what? Authors have feelings too!

"Dude, just continue with the story already! I've been walking for 5 minutes already in the same damn hallway!"

Whatever.

Kyle rolls his eyes at the comment and continues walking. He finally arrived, he saw the three boys already there. They were just waiting for him.

"Hey, was Kyle ever late for group meetings?" Kenny whispered to the others, they shrugged.

Stan answered, "We've been friends for so long, now that I think about it." Everyone murmurs and agrees.

"Guys!"

Everyone goes silent after hearing Kyle. "Oh- Uhm. Kyle! Looking great today." Kenny joked, but no one laughed, not even Eric freaking Cartman. Kenny's happy mood drooped and didn't say a single word after.

"So clearly, none of our plan As worked. But I have one more idea! Kyle, why don't you just tell your pare-"

"Stan. You know my parents. They will definitely make a big fuss and just embarrass me."

Stan put his fists beside him and made a somewhat heroic pose and look. He then said, "Okay.. Well I guess we'll have to switch for plan B." Just imagine heroic music playing too, just to add effect. And then imagine cricket sounds, because no one congratulated or said anything after he said that. This is awkward now.

Stan scratched the back of his head. "So uh.. What are you guys' ideas?" Everyone stayed silent once again, glancing at each other for an answer.

Kenny shrugged. "Maybe kiss in front of them?" He smirked when he saw Stan and Kyle's face turn red.

Kenny laughed at them, but Cartman didn't. He just glared at Stan intensely, which made him a bit uneasy.

"No but seriously. You guys want to seem real? Kiss. In. Front. Of. Them."

Wow, quick mood change. "Act like a couple guys! Just say some sweet things here and there like I love you or You're so hot or some sh!t. It's that simple."

Kyle huffed in frustration. Stan looked hesitantly at Kenny. "Any other ideas?"

No one else said anything. Kenny's goofy smile grew, and Kyle's frown turned even more miserable.

"I'll tell you how my plan is going so far tomorrow, promise."

The bell rang once again that signaled the boys to go home. As Kenny walked past Kyle, he clicked his tongue and lifted his head up with his hand.

"Douchebag." Kyle said under his breath, he was clearly annoyed. Stan just sighed and patted his back as they walked out. While Cartman stayed behind. Suspicious, right?

His hands formed fists, he was angry.. But why? Well, what if I told you... He had a humongous crush on Kyle? Obviously one-sided though. Cartman being Cartman, a person who always gets his way, will definitely attempt to foil the plans they made up.

Cartman wore a mischievous smile. "Kyle will be mine."