in the midst of a break down, i texted you.
actually?
you texted me first,
heard me sobbing from the other room...
that's what i presume, at least.
literally right across the hall...
and you couldn't force yourself to get up
to come check on me.
ouch.
anyway...
you texted me, "are you crying?"
no, i am totally fine...
just wailing for the fun of it?
then you asked what was wrong
and i told you.
"i'm insufferable.
i'm alone.
i'm alone because i am insufferable.
i am a bad person,
and a bad friend."
and after that,
"have you taken your meds?"
i couldn't help but laugh
it is a perfectly reasonable question to ask
and yet...
i laughed.
i think it is because
i really never thought that
i would become the type of person
who gets asked if they're off their meds.
it was funny,
because i never thought i would be that person.
and yet? here i was.
alone, on my bed, crying
and laughing at the same time.
because someone i love
someone that i know loves me
asked me if i was
"off my meds".
holy shit.
