Mafia GC FANFICTION

Ashley's Hand Written Story : Forever In My Heart

[...Play the video as BGM while you read...]

She stared off into the moon as she thought to herself..."I wonder if he thinking about me too? Just like how im thinking of him...?" This complicated relationship started months back, after what initially started off as joking, she started to actually start having feelings.

Since the beginning he'd had a crush on her, but as time went on it felt like he started loosing feelings and while she stared to fall for him even harder...it just seemed impossible that anything would happen between them. She knew they were both attracted to each other in some way so she wondered why there was no action.

"Maybe he just wants to focus on himself? Or perhaps he's just not ready to be in a committed relationship?" She wasn't an unattractive girl or anything, at most she was quite exceptionally beautiful. So she poundered why this was happening.

She envied the "normal people" and hated being pretty, she thought to herself, for normal people or "ugly" people, they fear not of being lied to about being loved, when being loved they know for sure that the person loves them for who they are as a person, for pretty people you honestly can't tell if they are only there for your looks and face.

She texted him hoping that he would reply back and say something to her, he was online but as usual he didn't come...not until 3 hours later he opened her message and left it on read. "I really suck huh...we aren't even together but yet I still want him to myself..." She started tearing up as she watched his story on Snapchat, he was with another girl.

A girl who was much more beautiful and you can tell she has an even better soul. "I'm seriously a idiot, here I am, obsessed over a man who doesn't even care, he has that other girl for fuck sake..." Tears overwhelmed her face as she spoke to herself. "It's fine...please do keep ignoring me...so that I can finally loose feelings...".

The next day he texted her, but today he asked for something more rashy then usual, but she still did it for him because she loved him so she wanted to please him. After that he never replied again. She knew she was being played and she was being stupid but she couldn't beat to disappoint him.

She became what she was afraid of most...a fool who was drunk on love...a one sided love to be exact...the next day he called her and told her how much he appreciated her, he showered her in wonderful words and made her feel like she was the most treasure human.

But the next day he ignores her as if she doesn't exist. "Let me just go write in my journal" *sigh* her heart was big but it was empty, full of broken promises and lies fulfilled by what she thought was love, she knew she was being fooled, but if it was for him...it would be okay....and there she wrote, pen in hand...

"I don't regret giving you my love...I just wished you would appreciate it more...I love you alot...but I know your not mine...I know you love her now and therefore I can no longer have you...but yet why do I keep praying to still have you...?"

Tears falling again as she continued writing. "I hate myself for being so attached...I know damn well you don't give a shit about me, I know your just being nice to me but please... don't do this with me if your not going love me...stop making me fall in love with you if your not going to truly love me back"

"Everyday when you don't text me I go look at our old messages and reminisce your lingering words in my heart...everyday I show up with a bright smile and happy attitude but in reality I just want to disappear from the world. Your one of the only reasons why I want to continue, but even you are always ever changing"

"...Sometimes I wish I never met you, so I wouldn't know the feeling of knowing you but not being able to have you around...I wish I was someone's first choice, I've been broken before but this is a different type of broken..."

She stared out the window as her tears glistened in the moonlight..."everytime I tell you I love you, I really do mean it, everytime you tell me you love me, it's just being nice...I just need to accept I'm no longer the girl you really want...you seem so happy with her, am I a bitch for wishing she wasn't here? She's so sweet and kind, meanwhile compared to me I'm just a tainted girl..."

"...I just wished to be loved like anyone else, so why? Why must I go through this...? Part of me really wants to know if any point or time did you feel the same way about me like how I feel with you?" And like that she signed off.

Walking almost lifeless like to her bed where she sank and cried until she fell asleep.
The next morning she woke up to her phone's alarm but her eyes remained closed, she heard her mom calling her name...but she ignored it...she didn't care, she needed sleep.

As the pain in her heart grew, her phone started buzzing, she saw it was from him, but she didn't bother waking up to answer it.
She stared to distance herself from everyone. A week later he announced he was dating the other girl within just 3 months they got married.

Just as she expected, she was numb, her journal was the only thing she could rely on to reveal all her emotions and feelings. " I'm wondering if we had met differently, in a different place, different time, would we had stood a chance...?"

"...I got too attached to something that was temporary and now I wasted time paying for it...if we were in a parallel timeline...do you think we would have been happy? Do you think we would have been together? Or would you still perhaps choose her over me."

"You know...when we first met I never knew I would be so attached but here I am...Goodbye...I hope that you live your life happily with her"

"...And like the moon, I could only look and love you but can never call you mine..."

"...Like the sun and moon, in the same sky but may never meet together..."

His name was engraved in her heart, but not in her destiny...

The End...