living hell [MULTIFANDOM]

seven (golden quartet)

Hermione: It's called cauliflower, not ghost broccoli.
Harry, eyes wide: I know what I saw.

*Riley sneezes*
Harry: Riley, are you sick? Here, let me wrap you in a blanket and hand-feed you some warm soup while singing you a lullaby!
*Ron sneezes*
Hermione: Oh my god. Shut the hell up.

Hermione, holding a fork: You know you're talking a lot of shit for someone who has 2 perfectly good eyeballs each cost about $16,000 on the black market.
Ron: ....
Hermione: *lip smack*

Harry: I'm going to hell.
Riley: Probably.
Harry: I'll pick you up?
Riley: *nodding* Carpool.

Riley: Harry, what are you doing?
Harry: Making chocolate pudding.
Riley: It's four in the morning, why are you making chocolate pudding?
Harry: Because I've lost control of my life.
Harry: Here's your pudding, Ron.
Ron: Oh that's okay, I'm not hungry anymore.

Ron: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time.

*2nd year, before harry and riley got together*
Harry: Do you ever wonder why you're still single?
Riley, eating mayonnaise straight out of the jar with a spoon: Yeah... I mean, I'm perfect! Who wouldn't want to date me?
Harry, sighing: I can name a few people...

Hermione: Hey guys I just found a new song I really like-
Ron: Is it about death?
Hermione: No.
Harry: Is it about drugs?
Riley: Is it about sex?
Hermione: NO- it's about happiness and peace and-
Ron, Harry, and Riley: no <3

*after robbing gringotts*
Riley: It's nice to be wanted, you know?
Ron: Not by the law!

Riley: Hold on! I'm having one of those things... a headache with pictures.
Ron: What the fuck?
Hermione: She's having an idea.

Hermione: *Plays Slender: The Eight Pages*
*Jumpscare*
Hermione: *Jumps back* OH SHIT, IT'S A WHITE GUY!!!

Hermione: Riley and Ron told me that brown is just navy orange, and I have never been more disappointed with something I agree with.

Hermione: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small.
Riley: I would say infinitesimally.
Ron: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words.

Ron: I really like Eminem.
Riley: I prefer skittles.
Hermione: He's talking about the rapper.
Riley: Why would he eat the wrapper?

Riley: What the fuck.
Riley: ESPN is showing 2003 national jump rope championship.
Riley: Who the hell watches jump rope competiti- ooh bouncy.

Harry: Adulting is hard.
Harry: How do I quit?
Hermione: Time travel.
Riley: Die.