Soldier Boy

04

Carissa's POV

June twentieth, 2013

Cameron drove to Shep's landing. It was now summertime, which meant he'd been home for six months now.

Logan was in the backseat sound asleep.

Cameron turned the radio up a little so that Tim McGraw's Please Remember Me could play.

I smiled, cracking the window a little so that my arm could dangle. The wind blew my hair.

Cameron laughed as he sped up faster, stopping at poorly placed stop signs or when a car was coming down the dark dirt road.

"You remember when we were, I don't know, sixteen and came here for the first time? We slow danced under the stars to this song," Cameron said as he looked over at me, keeping one hand on the wheel as he wrapped a piece of my hair around his finger and undid it.

"That was the first time I knew I loved you," he continued.

I smiled at him. "Loved me?"

He laughed. He scratched his neck and nodded.

"I was a love-sick puppy. But you were oblivious. It wasn't until we had danced here that I knew what I knew. I'm surprised you never knew. Most of our peers knew."

I flushed and looked out the window, at the empty dark sky. It was a cloudy, foggy night and the moon wasn't even visible.

"I wish I had known about Logan, though. I would've been there for you, if I had of known. I mean, I missed six years of his life, and I can't get that back," he said.

I stayed quiet until the only sounds in the old beat up truck were the soft snores of Logan. I looked back at the little boy and smiled.

"We're here," Cam said, unbuckling his seatbelt before going around to the back passenger side and waking up Logan.

"I hate to wake you up," he whispered as the boy fell into his embrace and started rubbing his eyes sleepily. "But I'll teach you how to fish here."

Logan smiled and looked around; he had never been fishing before, and Shep's Landing was foreign to his memory.

I grabbed the poles out of the back of the truck and walked over to where the boys were; Cameron flashed me a smile as he quietly taught our son how to fish.

As the breeze blew the tall pines in the summer night air, and the crickets chirped and fireflies came out from the tall grass, I looked towards the two guys in my sight.

Arm in arm, Cameron chuckled as Logan reared his pole back and the line ended up in a nearby tree.

"Almost there, buddy. Keep going," he whispered.

As Logan fumbled with his pole and line, he'd missed the look Cameron shot me. One that screamed, I love him. I love you.

I broke contact with him. He cleared his throat and kept helping Logan. I sat on a tree trunk and looked out towards the lake, a memory hitting me full force.

It was three days after Cameron left to go be deployed. Gavin was uptown at the bar, helping teach our newest bartender, Mallory. Mom was outside in the barn cleaning the horse stalls and I was inside sulking on the couch "reading." I was more or less crying over a boy.

"Hey, I need some help. Daisy broke out of her stall and the foal..." Mom stopped in the doorway when she saw me curled up in the fetal position crying into his over-large sweatshirt.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She asked, concern crossing her face as I felt the couch dip and her hands smooth back my hair.

"I miss Cameron," I whispered. Mom tsked and nodded her head.

"Of course you do. I do too. You know, he was like a second son to me. His mom and I are great friends."

I sat up and wiped my eyes. "Why does it feel like my heart's been ripped from my chest?"

She sighed and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. She kissed my forehead.

"That's what love does. Love makes you feel full, then empty and heartbroken all at once. Get some rest, Carissa. He'll be back before we realize it."

End flashback.

"I loved him," I whispered. Logan's squealing as Cameron reels in a bass, and it makes me smile, seeing them bond.

I pulled my legs up to my chest and sighed.

"Wanna try fishing?" A voice sounded behind the tree-log.

I turned and locked eyes with my little brother.

"What are you doing here?" I asked towards Gavin, who shrugged in return.

"Julie came to the house to go see Dad, because it's the anniversary of his death. Mom went, and Nicole is on vacation with her family, so I decided to sneak out. Everything working out with Lover Boy?" He cracked a smile.

I rolled my eyes and scoffed. "We aren't lovers, Nathan. We're just two people who so happen to share a child together."

Gavin nodded. "Right... yeah, you're still lovers. Is he a good Dad so far?"

I dismissed his comment about us being lovers and nodded as Gavin took a seat on the log and placed his pole between his legs.

"You're not supposed to be fishing here with a pole," I commented. Gavin scoffed.

"Whatever. Answer the question and stop playing around."

I sucked in a breath before giving my smart aleck of a little brother his answer.

"He's a good dad."

Gavin nodded as the crickets chirped again, and a distant wolf howl sounded up in the mountains.

"Good. He better treat you right."

I laughed. "Gavin, we aren't going to get m..."

But he was already gone, his car heading back onto the road headed home.

My phone buzzed.

"Curfew in ten. Mom would skin me alive if she knew I snuck out. I see y'all's wedding in the future <3." ~Gavin.

I typed back a response, my fingers flying over the keyboard.

"The only wedding I see in the future is your own. Tell Nicole I said hey. Good job on the "Nicole is on vacation with her family" lie. I almost believed it." 

My gaze met Cameron's as he waved at me. I waved back, fighting the feeling in my gut.

My brother wasn't right, was he? There's no way I'm going to marry Cameron Langford.