You forever ClxMv Lestappen

Who am I ?

*the summer break Monaco*

Charles had once again broken up with another girl. She had told him that he wasn't affectionate enough and in all honesty he had to agree. He had trouble sometimes keeping feelings for girls for a long time.

He was a bit sad of course but it wasn't like he had really and truly loved her either. He posted his usual insta story asking fans to leave his ex alone and respect privacy, which was becoming quite a common sight by now. He found himself scrolling through Instagram when he came across a pic of Max with his helmet hair and dripping with sweat

*Charles pov*

"Damn hes hot" I thought. Wait a second Charles what did you just say? Max Verstappen was hot? I must be going crazy. It's not like I'm really into guys or anything but no I couldn't deny it Max was attractive and not like in a good looking friend sort of way.

*2 hours later*

I had never been this confused in my life before not even at Ferrari strategy. In the past 2 hours I had went through almost every girl I had dated in my head and I was so confused. I loved them all or so I thought but like more in a fun friend sort of way. Every time I had kissed or had sex there was always an empty feeling inside which I had assumed was mostly normal. After all I had never really intended on marrying these girls or anything.

Arthur my brother was bisexual and now that I thought about it, I had always sort of been jealous of whenever he brought home a guy. Maybe I wasn't straight after all?

Then I realized, well more so allowed myself to finally admit it. I had never really liked girls, just that was what society told me I should like so naturally I did. There was maybe once or twice growing up where I had thought a guy looked good but never in a sexual way.

*The day after*
Fine well this is embarrassing but I went down to the beach today. I had only went down to truly confirm to myself what I had already known. My head was clear now. I had walked past multiple girls in bikinis who were definitely pretty and looked good but that was all. I wasn't staring or even attracted to their bodies. There was many guys there and almost instantly I found myself staring but it wasn't really how I thought it would feel. More of a "wow he looks really hot" not straight up lust for him which I had noticed many of my friends act around girls. There was also a voice in the back of my head telling me what I was doing was wrong, very wrong and even I myself was slightly embarrassed.

I had ran back to my apartment and before I knew what was happening I had started to cry. All the feelings of the past few days had caught up and now they were coming out. I suddenly realized how scared I was. What would the racing world think? After all every other driver was straight and basically all of the mechanics and engineers too.

I decided to text Arthur because at least he would understand (or at least I hoped)

Charles:
Hey bro

Arthur:
Hey bro wassup

Charles: Well I sort of want to tell you something

Arthur: Are you ok? You know you can tell me anything right? And yes I know you're gay

Charles: Wait what yes but how? Anyway it doesn't matter I just don't know what to do. I only really truly realized it yesterday and I'm scared now really scared

Arthur: Aww Charlie don't worry that's perfectly normal. I too felt the same a few years ago. I won't lie to you it doesn't really get much easier but it certainly becomes more normal and I promise you will be happier being true to yourself than living a lie. And Charles you did make it a bit obvious by staring at every guy I brought home. Are you going to tell mom?

Charles: Yes I will soon. I don't know when but I want to figure things out for myself first. Ty Bro

Arthur: Oh that's perfect then and don't worry she was always so supportive of me. Charlie please understand I'm always there for you. Ok ?