Triton's Destiny

Part Thirty-Eight

Maki had never felt so alone in his life. His cell was dark and cold, with only a tiny vent near the high ceiling to bring in fresh air. At first, he'd tried to scent the ocean through those terribly inadequate carved holes, but all he got was lungfuls of stale mustiness with not even a hint of the sea. Trying to get comfortable on the rickety cot had only reminded him of Tristan's lovely, soft bed and made him cry over the thought that he'd never get to share it with him again. So, he was now huddled on the filthy floor with dampness he didn't even want to contemplate seeping through the fabric of the beautiful trousers Tristan had given him. They were most surely ruined by now, but his trousers and his boots were the only things he had to wear, since his shirt had been destroyed by his half-triton transformation.

The threadbare blanket over his shoulders was the only protection he had against the damp chill that seemed to sink straight into his bones. His fins and lures had faded away before he'd even been locked away, much to the surprise of the guards dragging him here. When the cell door clanged shut, Maki looked just as human as they did, his skin pink once more, his ears round, and not a scale or wispy cirrus to be found.

If the guard chief hoped to do any testing on his triton form, then Maki suspected the human would be disappointed. He was fairly certain that he'd never see his tail, fins, or lures again. And while he was fine with that when it meant spending his life with Tristan, the absence of his aquatic form was now a testament to everything he'd lost, everything he'd sacrificed.

They'd brought him a bowl of water when they locked him in and, curious about the strength of his dwindling power, he'd submerged his hand in it instead of drinking it. The first time, his hand had shifted over to his grey triton skin, the second time, just his fingers. Now... He pulled his hand out of the dirty water and watched droplets fall from the tips of his very human fingers. Not even the water's energy could change him now. He'd wanted to be human and now he was. But he'd desired humanity in order to share a life with his human mate. Now the fulfillment of his wish felt more like the eternal sentence of an inescapable curse. Now he was just a human behind bars, awaiting punishment from those who had no hope of understanding him.

All he'd done was defend the man he loved. He'd gotten a little vengeance on some criminals who completely deserved what they got for all the horrible things they'd done to others. If he hadn't been revealed as an inhuman creature, no one would have questioned Maki's motives or called him dangerous. No, they probably would have celebrated Maki's courage and tossed the bullies in prison instead. Maki was all too aware now of how it felt to be persecuted based solely on what he was, with no regard to who he was. In an ironic twist of fate, he found himself judged just as harshly as tritonkind judged all humans. He supposed, now that he was a human, that served some kind of warped logic, as cruel as it was.

"Tristan, I'm sorry." His voice sounded hollow in the vast emptiness, devoid of joy. "I'm so, so sorry." If he'd just left the situation alone and hadn't needed to be some kind of hero, if he hadn't taunted the sailors, if he hadn't shown himself to them... Then they never would have known what he was and he wouldn't have been taken away from Tristan.

Anaru, Hana, Ika... He'd let them all down. He was supposed to be careful, be smart, and he'd thrown everything away on a single act of stupid bravado. It would have been better to just wait for Tristan's summons in his underwater cavern. At least then they'd still be together.

And what would his family think if they were still alive? His parents would be so disappointed in him. Kai would think he was an idiot. To throw everything away like he had took a special kind of moron, one who didn't deserve to have the things they wanted most. Maki was suddenly glad that his family wasn't around to witness his descent into ruin. The fewer people who knew what happened to him, the better. It was fewer people to disappoint.

An unexpected squeak drew his attention to the space beside his water bowl where he saw a small brown animal with twitchy whiskers nosing at the rim. A smile tugged at the corner of Maki's lips. It was cute and its whiskers reminded him of Ika's. He held out a finger, trying to show the animal that he wasn't a threat. "Hello, little friend. Thank you for coming to visit me."

The animal sniffed at the edge of the bowl again, making Maki wonder if it was thirsty.

"You don't want to drink that," he said. "It's not very clean." But he supposed water was water, and if the animal needed it... He dipped his hand into the bowl and lifted out some water. Then he set his hand on the floor where the animal could reach.

It sniffed at his fingers and then braced its tiny clawed feet against his skin as it stretched and dipped its head inside his cupped hand. Its whiskers tickled his palm as it drank and Maki smiled for real. It felt good to help another living creature. When it was done, Maki poured the rest of the water back in the bowl, saving it in case the animal wanted more.

Then he noticed how the creature moved as it retreated once more. It didn't so much walk or scurry as it hobbled, one of its legs bent at an angle different from the other one. "Oh no..." Maki bit his lip and fought back tears. "You're hurt, aren't you?"

The animal couldn't answer him, of course, but its impairment was obvious. Bending down, Maki carefully lifted the creature in his palm, bringing it close to his face so he could look at its injury. To him, it looked like its leg was broken and while it didn't act like it was in pain, Maki's heart ached for the tiny animal anyway. He wanted very much to help it.

Cupping both hands around the creature, he brought it close to his heart and closed his eyes, reaching deep within himself and searching for any thread of lingering healing energy. The fact that he couldn't even feel the heat of the animal's injury, though, filled him with sorrow. He couldn't feel where his energy was supposed to go, but that didn't matter much, since there was no energy to send anyway. A bereft whimper fell from his lips. The loss of his ability to heal others and ease pain truly gutted him. That was his greatest gift and now it was gone. He set the poor creature back down and pulled his knees to his chest, curling in on himself in complete anguish. He was no use to anyone anymore. Perhaps this was the best place for him after all.

As tears streamed down his cheeks, he pulled his blanket tighter and buried his head in his arms. He was nothing now. Ordinary. Unremarkable. And, just as Hana had warned him, no one was here to love him in his human mundanity. He'd given it all up for nothing. Because Tristan had been taken from him just as he'd been taken from his mate. He had no hope that anyone would let him go once they discovered they couldn't get out of him what they wanted. No. They'd find something to blame on him in order to keep him locked away because they were afraid of how he was different from them. This was his fate. This was his future. And it wasn't anything like what he'd imagined or dreamed. As hopelessness overwhelmed him, he covered his head with his arms. He blocked out the merciless world and cried.