You're Mine

24: His Favorite Words

Rose's Perspective:

I decided to open up to Alice about some of the things I had experienced before moving here and how it felt like everything was coming back to haunt me on my first day here when I saw James. I had always thought that James was my first love, but looking back, it was a lot of manipulation and I let it happen partially because I didn't understand what he was doing but also because we had such a close friendship prior to being romantically involved. Alice listened and created a space where I felt like I could explore my own thoughts in a new way. She said it sounded like a relationship I never actually wanted to be in, but rather I just thought I could help him and didn't want to lose him as a friend. I sat in silence for a moment before I realized she was right.

"Love isn't supposed to feel like you're doing everything the other person wants just to appease them," Alice said gently. "It's supposed to feel like a mutual understanding and a safe space to share your true feelings," she added. "Would you say you feel that now with Zander?"

"Yes, entirely," I responded. "I don't really fear losing him in the sense of him leaving me or not being able to give him what he wants. It's more of a not wanting to lose him in a sense of not wanting anything to happen to him, if that makes sense," I explained.

"It does," she said with a smile as she brushed her sandy blonde hair out of her face and sipped her coffee.

"Alice, have you ever been in love?" I asked her. It seemed like she knew so much about the way it felt and the healthy and unhealthy characteristics of it.

"I have," she said as she turned to look out the window.

"What happened?" I asked her softly.

"He found his mate," she said with a smile before turning back to make eye contact with me.

"I'm sorry," I said. It was hard to think of how to comfort her in that as it seemed mates were just always something to be celebrated in the werewolf world. "I'm sure that had to be really difficult," I added.

"Thankfully it could've been worse," she said with a sigh as she braced herself to say more. "His name is Eli, I'm sure you'll meet him if you haven't yet. He goes to college in Virginia, he's a year older than us. We started seeing each other when I was 15 and he was 16. It ended between us just before Christmas time and he brought her here to meet his family for the holidays," she said with her face down towards the table. "She's really beautiful and I've heard they have plans to move here after graduation. They're splitting the summer with both of their families, so they're here now and they'll go to Virginia in a month or so to stay with her family until school starts again."

"Do you guys still talk?" I asked her.

"No, we just pretend like each other doesn't exist," she said with a quiet chuckle. "But his mother and my mother are best friends, so I see her often," she added.

"That must be hard on you," I offered quietly.

"Yes and no. Thankfully they live so far away that I don't have to worry about it much. And I'm hopeful that I'll meet my mate before they move back here one day. Everyone gets a happy ending," she said with a smile.

"You deserve that," I told her truthfully.

"You and Zander give me hope," her tone shifted to be more upbeat. I smiled in response. "He adores you. It's like he's matured years in the months he's known you," she added.

"How was he different before?" I asked curiously. I wanted to know as much as I could about Zander. Every chance to learn more about him lit my heart on fire.