𝙽𝚘𝚝 𝙰𝚕𝚕 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚜 𝚂𝚑𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜(𝚂𝚑𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝙼𝚎)

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚃𝚎𝚗

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

song of the chapter: daredevil by fiona apple

"i guess i must be a daredevil. i don't feel anything until i smash it up."

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

          I sat at lunch with Kenji, Adam, Juliette, and James, all of us sitting in what seemed to be an awkward silence. Juliette had taken us over the conversation she had with Aaron.

"So what do you think?" she asked. "About what he said about Anderson? Do you think he's right that Anderson won't care if he's been taken hostage?"

"That might actually have some merit," Adam confirmed, pursing his lips.

"I told you guys that before we took him," I reminded them, crossing my arms. "He couldn't care less. It was a completely useless move."

"He cares that you're here," Kenji pointed out, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Yes, because I'm useful to him," I retorted, rolling my eyes.

"It's weird," Kenji observed with a shake of his head. "We haven't heard a single thing from their side and it's been over forty-eight hours."

"What does Castle think?" Juliette challenged.

"He's stressed out," Kenji explained. "Ian and Emory were really messed up when we found them. I don't think they're conscious yet."

"Yeah, Bianca and I have been working our asses off," I grumbled. "They got really fucked up."

"Maybe some food will make you feel better," Kenji intoned.

"If you tell me to eat one more time, I will snap your neck," I cautioned, not even a little bit of it a joke.

"How much do you weigh?" Kenji questioned. I felt like fire was rising in my throat.

"Excuse me?" I spat, not at all amused with the question.

"He asked me the same thing," Juliette mumbled, rolling her blue green eyes.

"Your chart says 105," he told me. I want to die right then and there. "That was two months ago. I'd say you lost a good ten pounds since then."

"Are you really discussing my weight right here in front of everybody?" I demanded, an anger eating away at me like I hadn't felt in a long time.

"You're 5'6", which means you're severely underweight," he informed me. "So no, you will not leave the table until you eat."

"Kenji," Adam snapped at the boy.

"I'm worried about her," Kenji defended himself. "She's like my little sister. I don't want her to starve herself to death because she's trying to lose weight she doesn't need to lose."

"I don't starve myself to lose weight," I shot, my jaw clenching.

"Then why do it?" he demanded.

         I met his eyes, and I saw his concern. I could feel that he was incredibly worried about me. I didn't care.

"I do it because I'm a murderer," I glared at him. "I don't deserve to live. And if I have to, I don't deserve to do it comfortably. Every time I look at food, I think of all the people whose lives I've ended. I think of the people who are starving right now because of my family. Do not ever comment on my body again, Kishimoto. I will kill you."

         With that, I stood up and stormed out of the dining hall. Anger was coursing through my veins. I felt humiliated and pitied.

           I felt a hand gripping my arm and yanking me along. I dragged myself away, turning to face Bianca.