So change... for someone who kept holding on, it's quite difficult to let go. It has been quite a while since our last engagement. Things have been happening, some good and bad, but I've honesty been feeling it for the past couple of days.
A thought occurred about the future, focusing on an event that I'm not ready for... I felt like my destiny was not aligned with proper happiness. This brought me to tears, and the storm was far from over.
It's funny that my friends came up with a new nickname for me, "Lord Q," a persona that took the style of the 1800s with exquisite taste, if I might add... that guy would question his value towards everyone around him. A person who gets blindsided by reality, who has held on to hope for so long.
I've held on to this hope, and I blame myself because I'll admit I was selfish. I feel like the only villain here is me, myself, and I. This may be a conversation where I'm speaking to myself, or it's reaching that climax of a eulogy....
I don't disregard that it is human to feel, but I am truly sorry that I was able to feel in those memories. As I sit here and expose myself in words that are truthful dimmed with grief. This moment feels like I just need a hug because I want to believe that there is a new chance for me out there because I've been exposed to the wrong portrait of love.
So this is what it feels like starting at the beginning. I survived, but at what cost? So before I close the door, but from my perspective because I've sugar coat my hope with assumptions and I'm truly sorry, I hope you can forgive me.
My heart is silent... Goodbye
YOU ARE READING
Roses bloom but I bleed...
PoetryHey you: I'm the one who drowns in his thoughts constantly, has a variety of imperfections and yearns for those qualities of a rose. See this journey as if you are riding a roller-coaster, it won't spiral out of control but it has its ups and down...
