Between Octobers

May 30th

May 30th

I thrust the metal pan into the dirt and heaved a mound of soil into the waiting wheelbarrow.

Cool dirt flew onto my legs. It was too warm for jeans. Yesterday's dark clouds had passed us by without a drip. I repeated the movements, intently shoveling until sweat ran down my forehead.

Arnold died. I found him, listless, inside the garage yesterday. When I got him to the vet emergency hospital, it was too late. I had him cremated.

Noah was taking it the hardest, pretending like nothing was wrong, and Caleb wanted a puppy. When they came home from school, we would bury him. Arnold always liked lying under the pine tree in the corner but the roots were too large and mangled to dig around, so I settled for a wide open space on the opposite side of the yard—the corner I was going to use for a garden—because he used to lounge there in the sun on cool mornings.

As I patted my non-existent belly, a shadow moved between the flat boards in the fence. The sound of a metal latch clanged as the new gate to the adjoining yard opened up. I held my breath, nerves welled in my throat.

I started shoveling again, as if I'd never stopped, like I hadn't noticed his presence.

"Can I help with that?" His hand moved to take the shovel.

"No, thank you," I tightened my grip.

Evan's hand pulled back and I noted the loose skin on his long fingers. When I straightened up to stare, he was noticeably thinner. His pupils were dilated in the bright light. All my tenderness faded to exasperation. 

"What are you doing here?" I thrust the shovel heatedly into cold earth. 

"Don't you miss me at all?"

I bit my lip.

"I know you're upset with me, Gracie, but for all the wrong reasons."

"What are the right reasons, Evan?" When he didn't answer, I changed the subject. "How is the hunt for our voyeur going?"

"My investigators learned where the original video was uploaded and determined what type of phone it was that took the recording. That helped to find where it was purchased, but it was probably paid for with cash. They've got a short list of people they're looking at, but no one's saying anything yet. It has been taken down, though. But you know how that is. A million people have probably already downloaded it." He stood calmly with his hands in his pockets. Not a trace of nervousness.

"How long have you been staying there?" I pointed towards Ray's old place that was supposed to be for Marcus.

"A few weeks." 

I nodded. "That makes sense." 

I'd noticed several things out of place lately. Mostly small things, like the television was on a different channel than it was when I turned it off. Things had been moved from one place to another. The most notable items: my pillow and perfume had gone missing. And I kept getting the strange feeling that I was not alone. I tried to convince myself that it was just me, but apparently it was him.

It burned that he was being so open about his secret hovering and yet so tight-lipped over something I'd caught him doing.  

"I heard you didn't start the last picture."

"The director was fired." 

"What about your other projects?"

"I pulled out," he shrugged, nonchalant, disheveled hair blowing in the breeze.