desire | liskook

19

Lisa
A wave of relief washed all over me as I heard the one voice I had longed to hear all afternoon. He was here, at last he was finally here.

I looked up to see his face, it was a bit shadowed at the door were he stood.

I saw the surprise on the officer's face by Jungkook's sudden confession of our relationship, because he froze for few seconds before recollecting his thoughts.

He then saluted a serious faced man also in uniform but with lots of decorations, who walked into the room behind Jungkook. By the look of how respected he was, I figured he was the Chief of Police.

Only heaven knows just how much I wanted to run to Jungkook and have him wrap me with those arms that had carried me up to our hotel room the night of the party.

But I can't do that. No matter how much I missed him and longed to hug him, to feel comforted by his words, none of that could happen.

Sometimes I tend to forget my situation and dare to dream. The man standing right in front of me was far from my league, so how dare I?

I felt embarrassed and shamefaced letting him see me in such a situation, but most of all I was disappointed. He seemed perfect, I mean he was okay so why was he just coming now?

I knew right from the start that I meant nothing to him, but I tried— I try to make him see me as different from what he assumes I am. This feeling of constant defeat, uncertainty and rejection was tearing me apart slowly.

Talking about walking on thin ice, this entire honeymoon have been one gigantic cluster of horrible experience after another.

I can't even manage two weeks of vacation with this man, how would I be able to manage a lifetime of marriage with him?

He ordered everyone out with just the both of us left in the room. Like a fool, I was finding it hard to take my eyes off him as he moved effortlessly from the door to take a sit opposite mine.

Now he was in front of me I could see his face clearly. It melted my heart to see just how stressed out he looked, and I couldn't even ask what the hell he's been up to.

He asked me tiredly to sit down, and I obeyed. I felt my whole body jump in excitement when he moved forward and held my hands in his, suddenly every single negative emotion I was feeling towards him disappeared.

His hands were soft on my skin, as he rubbed his thumbs over my hands comfortingly. He just sat there staring straight at me with concerned eyes that could get me intoxicated every time I look into it.

"Are you alright?" he asked

"Yes..." I answered nodding, but soon started shaking my head in protest when I realized I wasn't alright.

Maybe it was my exhaustion or maybe my frustration, but I just had to say something for relief the heaviness on my chest.

"Actually, I'm not alright. I was cuffed, dragged to the station, I've been yelled at constantly since I got here which was a long while ago. Still, all I could think about was you." I confessed shamelessly.

He wasn't angry or surprised by my outburst, he just held my hands, still stroking them gently with his thumb as he stared at me with apologetic eyes.

Okay, this was too much. Why isn't he saying anything? I can be more frustrated so I was about to ask him what kept him so long but I held myself.

Relax Lisa, don't overreact and take everything into consideration first.

I recalled what Yura has told me about Jungkook being a devoted partner and spouse, and for her to know him like that, they must have been very close. So whether or not they dated in the past, she was still an important person in his life.