The First Time (5sos fic)

Chapter 10

Crushed, that's what I feel. Harry has been rude to me because I don't love him. That just made my heart brake even more now. I thought life couldn't get better. With the million likes and a record label.

Standing in the kitchen, I realize that his actions makes sense but he did it in a jack ass way. He admitted his feelings for me and I couldn't tell him the same. Because deep down I know it's not true. I do love Harry, he's like a brother or was a brother. When he left my life I was broken. During time I learn to deal with it.

I manage to leave that damn house without crying. I walked to the car but before that I looked up at the window. Harry is staring down and what looks to be tears in his eyes and down his cheek.

I couldn't help but let the tears down. This fucking house is going to kill me. Hoping in the car I get a text from Harry.

Jackass-I didn't mean to make you cry. I promise I'll stay away from you and Eleanor. Well not El bc we r partners but as soon as the project is over I will

I texted back.

Me- you think that's going to help. Staying away from me won't help. Your like a brother to me Harry. I was crying because.. well bc I felt bad. I don't love you the way you want me to Harry. You deserve so much better than me. You will forever be in my heart Harry. Just not the way you want me too.

After that Harry didn't answer. I breath out a sigh. I roared the engine to life and drives back to my boyfriends flat. Calum.

He's right for me. He understands me in ways other people don't.

Or maybe he's just using you in some way.

My subconscious adds. She's a real bitch sometimes.

Now that my mind is clear and focus I need to think about Chloe. She's in pain and thinks that she's alone. I know it because my step sister was anoretic. She might not realize it, but she's going to die here soon if she doesn't do anything.

Chloe POV.

Sitting here looked in a fucking room while they talk about my actions. I'm a fucking adult. I'm doing this for my own good.

Good job, Chloe. Now here pretty soon you'll be pretty gorgeous even. No more being fat. You just have to stay strong. Nothing can hold you down. Stay hungry and you'll be beautiful.

Yes, I will and I'll prove Nail wrong. I look down at my legs to see my thunder thighs. I need to not eat and work my ass off. They'll try to stop me so I won't be pretty.

That is of course if you stop being weak. Your fat Chloe. You can't do it, you can't last food with out a week. You know how pathetic that is.

Look here comes little miss piggy having forty babies. Oh not pregnant must be all the fat.

"Shut up" I scream. Ashton runs in. His cheeks wet and his eyes are red. Blood shot almost.

"What happen" he kneels down in front of me. His eyes hold so much emotion I can't stand it. I can't tell if he loves me or playing me.

He's playing you dumb ass. No one could love a beast like you.

"Why" I ask. Ashton brings his hand and wipes his eyes. His long curly hair is no longer happy and his never ending smile has faded.

"Why, what"

"Why do you play me like a fool" he opens his mouth slightly. He lets more tears run down and I want to catch them all but I'm too confused and in pain. My stomach is killing me and the temperature is freezing.

"Playing you" he whispers. "If I'm playing you, why are you in my house. Why am I here for you with your problem, letting you tell me all the things that you say is true? Why am here fighting for you" with that he leaves the room. Leaving me heart less.

What kind of a person am I? I told the person I love that I hate him so many times because he told everybody.

Your becoming strong Chloe. Good job. Better take this compliment now you know I don't award you to anything almost.

The Voice is so annoying. She tells me I have to be perfect. To prove everybody wrong.

I crawl to the bed and under the blankets where it's warm. I don't need anyone. I'll be fine the I'll look gorgeous. Nothing can beat that.

The door opens and a sigh comes out of someone's mouth.

"Do you think that your alone" someone screams. That someone is Casey.

I stay silent and the sobs become louder.

"Am I being a bad friend or something? Answer me Chloe. I can't have you walk in on my life and then walk out. This is not going to be like Harry" she cried. I close my eyes. I can picture Caseys pissed off face.

"I don't think your a bad friend. I just think that I'm fat" I answer. All of a sudden a sudden thump went through the air. I raised my head to see Casey sobbing in her hands.

"Why though? I remember hating you in first grade because your were so pretty. When you and El talked me I felt like God has finally gave me something good in life" she cried. I remember the nights when Casey cried herself asleep at my house because she was worried that her mom might be fired or couldn't pay the bills and they might have to move out. Or on her birthday she got only a dollar from her mom but Casey was the happiest girl in the world. She new that the thought counted.

"If you think that's going to make me change my mind it's not" I snap.

"Changing your mind? I know you, Chloe. You never listen to anyone even if your life depends on it, which I this case it does" she screams. I move to walk over to her and comfort her but as soon as I stand up I fall. My legs are weak and my stomach is groaning. My vision is blurred and blackness takes over.