The World As I Know It

9). Struggling To Survive

I was struggling to cope. I will admit that. With all the exams, getting beaten up, bullies, food. It was all getting too much.

My body was becoming weaker and weaker because I had not been eating properly but whenever I felt like giving up my conscious would always convince me otherwise.

You need to loose weight.

You need to prove those girls wrong.

Quitters are weak.

My life consisted of getting up, going to school, being bullied, being beaten up, walking home, revising, coming up with excuses not to eat and then sleep. Once I woke up the next morning the cycle would start all over again.

I had seen Noah walking about school. He was immediately accepted into the 'popular crowd'. Girls swooned over him as he walked past and then glared at me simply because I was his neighbor.

We don't talk much. I haven't had the time. Occasionally he would text me after a particularly rough day at school and ask if I was okay and I would always you the same reply.

I'm okay. I'm fine.

I had got used to lying, and I wasn't proud of it. 

On one of the really bad days, I had been struggling to concentrate in class because my mind is constantly thinking about food. Constantly thinking about calories, fat, weight, people's opinions.

I also had P.E that day. I had been loosing weight, well that's at least what the weighing scales had said. I looked in the mirror and all I saw was fat. That is all I ever see.

I had started wearing a thin top underneath my school uniform so that when I had P.E I could cover my disgusting body. I had always managed to get away with wearing it but today we had a supply teacher and Kira and her followers and pointed out to the teacher that I was wearing it and it was against the school rules. The teacher made me take it off. Everybody was staring at me because Kira and made such a big scene that had attracted everybody's attention.

As I raised the top over my body to reveal my bra, tears were in my eyes.

"Fatty!" Kira yelled since the supply teacher had gone to the office. "Fatty, Fatty, Fatty!" she chanted and then everybody joined in. I pulled my P.E top over my head, covering my sickening body, tears streaming down my face while they continued to chant. Right there. Right then. I wanted to die.

"Oi!" The supply teacher yelled above all the chants as she burst into the changing rooms. "All of you in the sports hall now! Changed or not!" she boomed.

Before I went in she asked me if I was okay and I just nodded. Another lie.

We were playing dodge ball that day. Man, I hate dodge ball.

When the supply teacher was calling the register I could hear Kira whispering from behind me.

"Go careful when throwing the balls at her guys, it could get lost in her fat forever." Her gang snickered in response.

"Nobody is ever going to love her. She just isn't worth it." They kept giggling.

I tear slide down my cheek and a quickly wiped it away with the back of my hand, in hope that no one had seen. They kept going on with their horrible insults, I just wished that the teacher would hurry up with this damn register.

"She should just go and die. Nobody loves her. Not even her Father loves her." That caught my attention. How did they know about that?!

As soon as the register had been called I asked the teacher if I could go to the medical room because I felt sick. Surprisingly she let me go. This was the last lesson of the day so I was hoping to run home before Kira and her gang caught up with me.

***

The bell had sounded and school was finished. I bolted out of the medical room like my life depended on it. I ran across the school and was almost at the exit of the school when I was yanked backwards by my hair.

I was dragged to an enclosed area near the school exit. My head was forceful rotated to face none other than Kira, Charlie, Alexis and Jennifer. Shit.

I tried to run away put I was being held tightly by what looked like their new member.

"Hold her tighter, Bridget! I want her to be in pain." She ordered the new member of the gang. She looked like she regretted being here. Perhaps she was blackmailed into doing this.

It was the same routine. Being punched to the ground. Then picked until I stopped screaming because my voice had gone. My hair being pulled.

After 15 long minutes of being beaten they left me. Bridgett had left 5 minutes into the beating because she couldn't stand being there any long. I don't blame her. I would have gone too if I could.

It had started to get dark and I hadn't bothered trying to get up. As Kira said, nobody cares about me. Nobody would notice if I just stayed here. I just wanted to die. I was tired of everything. I was tired of struggling to survive.

_________________

Next chapter is going to be Noah's point of view. This should be interesting.

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