Kakashi x Iruka~ love hurts

Chapter 9: Friends? yeah right.

   It's been 2 weeks now. Kakashi was alot better, his body was not stiff and he could even run a marathon now. But due to iruka's insisting he was still in his house.

  Right now Kakashi was sitting beside a window. He remembered the whole 'incident that happened a week ago.
'He said he wanted to take care of me, well I'm fine now why woun't he let me go? Or is he still worried? About what?' Kakashi thought but tried to shake them off. 'We're friend now so no need to worry'. Kakashi could have escaped since, even right now for the fact he's near an open window. Kakashi still didn't get all this. This feeling... whenever he looked iruka in the eye as he speaks it's as if the world slows down, that beautiful (as if) scar of his that just enhances his features, the way he's just silly at times makes him want to laugh so hard it'll hurt, one day Iruka was talking to him telling him something about his health, but he was too busy staring at him, watching the way he moved his hands demonstrating what he meant and smiling at some point, it just gave him this fluttering feeling in his stomach, he didn't even realize Iruka waving his hand infront if his face, asking if there was something wrong or something on his face. Which Kakashi replied no that he was just thinking of something, which got iruka mad that he wasn't even listening and he even looked cuter to Kakashi while mad. Kakashi just couldn't understand this feeling. Was Iruka using some jutsu on him so that he woun't escape or what? Did iruk really want something else from him? With this Kakashi got up and marched downstairs where Iruka was.
  "Oh Kakashi, I thought you were..." he was interrupted by Kakashi slamming him to the wall, pinning him down.
  "So tell me, what else do you want?"
  "Huh?"
  "Ugh, I'm clearly fine now, and you still won't let me go, and it's clear that you've been using some  jutsu on me, because there's no way a whole me can feel such emotions, so just save yourself the consequences and tell me who you're working for."
   "Come on Kakashi, not this again, we've been over this and we're friends now, so why don't you trust me? Iruka asked, quite confused.
  "Well fine then, you wanna know why you're still here? I'll tell you then".
   "Yeah, cuz you want me all to yourself." Kakashi said.
   "Stop it already! It's for the same reason I told you before, to help you!" Iruka said wriggling out of Kakashi's grasp.
   "I know what you've been through Kakashi, I know your intentions right now, so what kind of a person will let his friend go out there and do the unthinkables? I just can't let you do that, I'll never forgive myself if you do."

   *Flashback*
  In hokage's office.

  "Iruka there's something else I need you to do for me."
  "What is it Lady Hokage?"
  "It's Kakashi... do you know why he ran off on that mission like that?"
  "No?"
  "Well you see... this isn't the first time it's happened. You know, sometimes, Kakashi thinks he should be with his ghosts."
  "Huh?!"
  "Yes. He does all this so that he can protect the village, but die at the same time. (Kinda like that Historia girl in attack on titans) No matter how much I lecture him and try to knock sense into him, nothing changes. His attitude... his heart of stone...no doubt, loosing those he held dear to him still takes a toil on him. So Iruka I need you to keep a good eye on him, no matter what." "Help fix that broken heart of his. His heart is breaking in two. All he thinks of himself as is a tool, with no other goal but to serve its user well. Something that'll be tossed aside if broken or blunt."

   *Flashback end*

  "When I said I wanted to help you that's what I ment. It's just unfair. As a shinobi we just have to pass through these things over and over again. We try hard to remind ourselves we're human. Even those whose who try to deny that fact ends up where tjey started... knowing those emotions exist among all. It's the sick reality we live in, nothing ever goes as planned in this cursed world, we shinobi have to face this over and over again, but still, we bounce back on our feet and continue where we stopped, I want you to do that too Kakashi, I want you to leave the past, forget the past and aim for a brighter future, do you know how many people that will be depressed if you ended your life now? Do you know how many people were worried sick when you were in the hospital? I too will never be able to bear it if you go just like that Kakashi, at first I thought it was all because I was just worried, but now I see there's alot more to that. Every passing day I see myself wanting to be with you more and more, wanting to be by your side to protect you, I know you don't and never will but I love you Kakashi, and I never want your name to end up engraved on stone, please Kakashi, reconsider!!!" Iruka said as he ran away, covering his face as his tears flowed like rain. Kakashi stood there, puzzled. "This man actually...cares....for reals, and did he just say he lo-...hey please wait!!!"
  Kakashi ran to the corner Iruka curled up in his face still buried in his hands. Iruka jerked a little when he heard kakashi's voice... it was soft and calm, almost unnatural, and he called his name. "Iruka" for the first time without mispronouncing it.
   "Iruka... I'm honestly sorry for all the trouble I've caused you and everyone else. I guess I was selfish myself too." Iruka stood up and looked into the jounin's eyes. They were full of guilt, but sadness, remorse and regret.
   "I was just being stupid, selfish and unreasonable. I only thought about my desires and what I thought was true, I didn't take time to read the writing on the wall. There's no way I can express how sorry I am Iruka. I hope you all can forgive me someday, but I know I don't deserve it. I don't deserve your kindness...but I hope you can at least give me another chance.......because I really love you, Iruka.

  With that Kakashi pulled down his mask and pulled him in for a kiss. Iruka stared wide-eyed as his cheeks burned up. His lips were so soft and the kiss was very light but passionate. Kakashi pulled back from the kiss and quickly pulled his mask up. Iruka was still shocked. Kakshi had just kissed him!
   "W...what w..was that fo..for?" Iruka asked fumbling with his words, blushing like crazy.
   "I've just felt this way for you a while now, but I just couldn't accept it, but you opened my eyes now, and I understand the true meaning of being human in the shinobi world."  "Those who abandon a mission are scum, but those who abandon their friends and comrades are even lower than scum. Thank you Iruka. Thank you for opening my eyes to reality. This is a sick world, but we must learn to bounce back from whatever tore us down. It's the pain we as shinobis endure that makes us stronger after all." They then hugged each other crying in each other's shoulders. They stayed like that for up to thirty minutes until they both fell asleep holding each other close on the couch.