[1] Midnight Lips | Ghost

𝐂𝐇. 75

𝐕𝐀𝐋
༻❁༺

I wiped the tears that made it out with the back of my fingers, sniffing once. When I pulled my head away from Simon's shoulders, it felt like my heart was ripping in two. If this was a cartoon movie, I was certain my heart would make a crack sound as I pushed away from the heat that was Simon's body. Once again, my hopes burned into ashes, and I wanted to feel angry because of it. Angry at everything, angry at him for giving me these promises only to prolong them, only to promise to keep these promises and make them true once we meet again.

And even if it pained me to admit it, Simon was right. The time apart—one month, only one month—would make us good. We needed some time apart. We needed to think about this, to clear our minds and sort out our thoughts. However, that didn't mean it didn't hurt that I wasn't going to see him for a whole month. Call me dramatic, but when you spend every second of the day for four weeks with a person that makes you feel like you are in heaven, you get attached, and then when suddenly you two have to part ways, it hurts.

Enough. I took a deep breath, pushing down all of my emotions. We were set to leave in about twenty minutes—I think—and I really couldn't afford to have my feelings all over the place this time. This was our last mission, the most important one, and it needed to go smoothly. Perfectly. Intactly. It might seem like I had one of the easiest tasks in this mission, because Soap and Price were literally haunting Hassan in the same building, but that didn't mean I had to be unserious about mine. No task was easy.

I spared a glance at Simon sitting so still next to me, I wondered if he was even breathing. But then he turned his head and met my eyes, and yes, he was breathing, but his cold eyes lacked the life in them. A switch was turned off and now he looked empty, cold, like nothing mattered anymore. My emotions gave a large pull, a little scared to see him change so quickly. I wanted my Simon back but he had already made up his mind, so I forced the urges away, unable to do anything. I smiled instead, but it felt shaky like my lips were trying to pull down. It was like my body knew I was not okay and was trying to stop me from pretending otherwise

God, I was going to miss him so much. His voice, his eyes, his words, his mere presence, his kisses and touches and hugs and praises and teases, his heart beating in his chest as I pressed my head against to hear it, his chest rumbling with that raspy laugh only I get to take out of him. Fuck, I couldn't believe the last time I experienced all of that was today, a few hours ago. Our last kiss happened a few minutes ago when he pressed me against the wall and kissed me in the middle of the hallway, where I thought everything was going absolutely fine.

I bit the inside of my cheek, and Simon followed the movement even though it was not visible. He looked at my lips and swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, but still didn't say anything. Meanwhile, there was a battle going on in my head as I stared at his lips full on display. I refused to believe we shared a last kiss like that, in the hallway like it was a game. Even if it was hot as hell, it wasn't the right one. It wasn't a kiss that we knew might be the last one.

I opened my mouth, but Simon looked away before I could form any words, pushing up to his feet with a simple, "We must leave now."

I raised to my feet and caught his elbow before he could walk away, my heart racing a little panicked. "Won't I get... a goodbye kiss?" My mind screamed when I watched his eyes soften, shining with that familiar spark as the sunlight dove into them. There he was, my Simon, still not completely gone.