Hagrid wasn't in his dungeon m*sturbating to his centaur dick collection. He was at Horizon alley, the best way to kidnap unsuspecting young wizards trying to go to school. DUMBLEFORE didn't care enough to notice, only paid attention when torturing students. Snape was too invested in his BBL, and Mcgonnagle was always too drunk to notice the various wizards that left and never came back. Then he fed the students to Aragog. Aragog was a sweetheart and loved the meals, but being a tarantula he had horrible eyesight and couldn't tell who was who. That's why hagrid always kept his distance.
Then Aragog would molt. Hagrid made sure Aragog got a good diet so he could molt healthily and Hagrid could sell the molts for money to exchange for information on the dark spells. In the most recent exchange with Umbridge, Hagrid paid extra to hear of a more modern spell- one that makes people spontaneously combust, and a potion that makes their genitals grow teeth.
Umbridge wasn't getting paid enough, she lived in London and the hogwarts paycheck wasn't enough, it was actually quite illegal the way she was underpaid. She didn't want to share such dangerous information, but she made an unbreakable vow to always tell the truth, and she needed the money in order to live.
Hagrid wanted to make such a potion, but the The ingredients were an issue. It required period blood and a tooth. It was quite difficult to get period blood, but he heard that DUMBLEFORE had a female servant. He would use her. Hagrid wanted to give the potion to his pet so that it had two mouths and could eat more and it doubled the speed of molting, doubling the money; and doubling the information Hagrid needed for his spells. He was gonna start a cult to overthrow the school staff and turn them into dragons, because he hated people; but he had to play nice then. Every prisoner in askaban would be used as sacrifices for the potions, because a dragon morphing potion required phoenix feathers, centaur dick pubes, and a human sacrifice. It needed to be an equivalent exchange in order to eradicate the human. It was his perfect plan.
In the mean time he would have to play nice. He used a love potion- alternate recipe once again given by Umbridge- of centaur dick, and made Dumbledore and SNAPE fall in love. He heard glamorous clapping and moaning in the closet, but while Dumbledore was distracted he grabbed the wand used to open the secret shed. It was muddy, and he left huge footsteps on the way there, but he was running out of patience so he hurried there. The night was foggy like a wet paper napkin.
When he got inside, he saw a cowering, quivering girl with fuzzy auburn hair. She was completely naked and chained to the wall. [AN: do I really have to describe it again? You guys know the gist.]
She shrieked at him, seemingly having no words to describe her pain. It reminded Hagrid of a dragon so much, he was so happy he almost cried. Dragons were the only thing that cheered up Hagrid.
Hagrid chuckled and opened the cell door. He reached in his pockets and fed her some bread. It made her less feral and instead she began sobbing as she ate. "Obby.... Iye kso sowwy" seemingly having a PTSD attack. She could barely speak. She was so underweight she was barely human. Hagrid loved that.
Hagrid got an idea. She was far too underweight to have a period, and if she caught a cold she'd probably succumb.
He would nurse her back to health; and groom her into servitude, making her his personal servant. He would treat the feral girl well. She clearly hated the staff responsible for her situation, so the relationship was mutual.
Hagrid unshackled her and kneeled, and despite his hugeness she might've been comforted. He patted her in the head and picked her up slowly, and cradled her like a baby dragon. He took her out of the shed, and brought her to his above ground shelter in the woods. He lit the bonfire and placed her next to it and begun cooking dinner.
When DUMBLEFORE and SNAPE were done having sex, they would get to the emergency announcement they had. They wouldn't be there for a while. DUMBLEFORE wouldn't notice his sex slave was gone.
When Hagrid finished dinner, he held the plate in front of the girl. But as she went to grab it, he pulled it away and said "Nuh uh uh."
He gave her his wand, and took her hand.
"Swear to be my servant, at my command."
She could barely speak, but she made the spell. Not having bad quality food in months, she would've done anything to eat food, it seemed mild in comparison.
"The vow has been done." He laughed manaically and handed her the plate and a bowl of water. Then he reached into the dresser and gave her dragon scales to wear, and centaur leather. The girl didn't question clothing. She wouldn't done anything too to be clothed again.
Having food and water in her system, clothes, and warmth, Hermine saw her oath as worth it.
She saw Hagrid about to leave and motioned at him to wait.
"Ow to me tooh." She said. "Ih oly fair."
Hagrid heard that. He communicated with dragons and spiders so a mere speech impediment was little to him. He agreed. He had a servant feral enough to keep, so it was only fair if he vowed too.
She gave him the wand, and she took his huge hand, wrapping her bony fingers around his palm.
"Et me fee the elves and ail tooh Roh."
Hagrid agreed to the oath, and left her to sleep.
Once she was back to heath, he would use her as a servant to collect materials. She was feral, and he knew she had potential. If she lived that long in Dumblefores dungeon she was clearly special. Now as a staff though, he needed to attend the meeting. So off he went.
