Ａｌｍｏｓｔ Ｙｏｕ

chapter eighteen : truth

I woke up the next morning to Harry shaking me softly, "Mads, Maddy baby, your mum keeps calling."

He said, and I rubbed my eyes, stretching against the bed. I turned to his night stand, grabbing my phone and answering. I immediately shot up at the sound of Rosie screaming and crying in the background.

"Mom, what's wrong?" I exclaimed, my heart beating at full speed. Harry sat down next to me, his hand gently on my back. He was fully dressed, and I remembered he was as going to leave to drop Sarah and Mitch off at the airport.

"She's been crying since I picked her up. She looks like she hasn't slept," she said, and I pulled my phone from my face, FaceTiming her. She answered with Rosie in her arms, my poor baby crying.

"Rosie, Rosie baby, look at momma." I said and she turned her face to me. She was red and snotty, her eyes looked so heavy, "Baby, what happened?"

"Secret!" She yelled and I shook my head, knowing this was one hundred percent Eric's doing.

I slid my settings down on my phone, beginning to screen record, then coming back to Rosie, "Baby no secrets, what happened? I promise we won't tell your dad. What happened?"

"No sleep. Daddy wake me up, all time." She cried, yells coming from her, "Mean, daddy. Mean."

She hid back in my moms neck and I felt anger escape through me, "I have to go." I said to my mom, hanging up. I got up quickly, slipping my bra on and the clothes I borrowed from Harry the night before.

"Madeline, baby, I'll take you home on the way to the airport."

"I'm not going home," I said, tossing my hair up in a bun, "I'm going to go show Eric a piece of my mind."

"Baby, no. It's not worth it. We will deal with it tomorrow, with the law—No, Harry! I'm dealing with this now. He doesn't get to do this. He doesn't get to torture my daughter that way. She's still a baby. He doesn't get to do that!" I yelled at him through tears, quickly turning on my heels and running out the door.

I bumped into Sarah along the way, who held me up so I wouldn't fall, "Hey, hey, what's wrong?"

She asked, her eyes searching my face and I just cried, shaking my head and pushing past her. Harry's house wasn't far from the sheriff's office, so I began running, running like I hadn't in a long while.

I felt so out of breath by the time I pushed the doors open to the sheriff's office, all the faces turned to look at me, each with wide eyes as I searched for him.

"Where's Eric?" I yelled, my eyes landing on Daniel.

"In his office." He said, in the same moment Eric came out.

"Madeline, what in the hell are you doing?" He said and I marched up to him.

"No, what in the hell are you doing? Keeping that poor baby up all night! She told me you kept waking her up, you kept being mean. Why? Cause she called the man that's been more constant in her life these past months than you have her daddy? You should be ashamed Eric Bridge! She's just a little girl."

I breathed heavy, feeling my knees slightly weak, my heart unable to slow. He laughed, looking around the office like I was crazy, "Maddy, I'm going to need you to stop imagining these situations to make you feel better about your parenting."

I yanked out my phone and put the volume all the way up before playing the screen recording I took, so that he and everyone else could hear.

"Really? Imagining? You're full of shit Eric!" I yelled and he pushed himself closer, so he was hovering over me.

"Leave, I suggest it. Strongly." He said, a clear threat.

"Or what? Is it going to be like that time you shoved me when I was four months pregnant, or the time you scared me into starving myself for the day when I was eight months pregnant. Or is this more like the time you verbally...you..." I felt my chest tighten, my body slowly going cold. My body started shaking, I could feel my knees begin to buckle and soon Eric was a blur.

"Maddy!" I heard Harry's voice from behind me before it all went dark.

—

I woke up in a hospital bed, my head was throbbing. I squeezed my eyes shut tight before opening them. I felt someone holding my hand, and when I looked down, it was Harry. His face was against the bed, soft breathes coming from him as he slept. I smiled small, moving my hand to squeeze his softly.

He stirred, rubbing his face with his free hand before looking up at me.

"Hey handsome." I said softly, my voice rasping from how dry it was.

"Hey beautiful, you hit your head pretty good. You've been out for two days." He said, swallowing, worry in his eyes,

"Two days? Where's Rosie?" I said, my heart starting to speed up again.

"Hey, hey relax. She's okay. She's with your mum, who....has temporary sole custody of her." He said softly, and my eyes narrowed a bit at him.

"What?" I said, attempting to sit up a bit, but failing when the sharp pain in my head hit.

"My lawyers, they got that granted the day you hit your head. That screen recording you took, was the nail on the head. You getting hurt meant you couldn't have the temporary custody, so they gave it to your mum. We have an official court date next month to get you the sole custody." He said, and as I listened to his words, I just cried. I closed my eyes tightly, feeling such relief at his words. Feeling like this was supposed to have been harder, but that was the thing, Harry made everything that much easier always.

"But Maddy,....we have to talk," he said softly and when I peeked up, his eyes were glassed over, "When were you going to tell me? I...I wasn't being nosy...your chart was just open while they were checking your vitals one day...Maddy....cancer?" He said the dreaded word and I felt the blood rush from me again.

I looked away from him, my chest heavy. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, "It happened way before you Harry. Every time they get rid of it, it just comes back. It's cervical cancer...." I felt the tears down my face as I opened my eyes and looked over at him.

"And you don't think I deserved to know?" He whispered and I bit my lip as I cried.

"No one expect my mom and Sal knows. If not I risked the whole town knowing. I risked Eric knowing and then I would never be able to get custody of Rosie." I said through my cries.

"But it's me...Maddy, it's me." He said, tears in his eyes, searching my face.

"I just always thought you would be long gone before it got worse." I said, and it sounded so horrible coming out of my mouth.

"But my feelings Maddy...you knew my feelings got involved." He said, sitting back and letting go of my hand.

"I know...I..." I shook my head, biting my lip, "I didn't want this Harry. I kept trying to tell you this past week. I kept trying. But how was I supposed to tell you I was dying? How do I find the words for that?"

His face softened a bit, his eyes wide, "What do you mean....you're not getting treatment?"

"Harry, I'm tired. It's been so many years of this, and it always comes back. My cervix is so messed up. I...I stopped getting treatments at the beginning of this year. We thought it was gone. But it wasn't. All of this was a couple months before I met you."

"No," was all he said, shaking his head and I bit my lip crying, "No, Rosie needs...Rosie needs her mum. You're young...you, no."

He wouldn't look at me and he slowly stood up, "I have to....I'm sorry, I have to go."

He walked away without saying anything else, and I squeezed my eyes shut crying. That feeling of peace I had gotten too. That feeling of understanding that it was okay if I died, all melted away at the thought of now also not being with him.

His face, my mom's, Sal's...my Rosie Posie. They all flooded my mind in such a painful way. I left out a cry, my body turning and curling to a tight ball. I hated this. I hated my life. I hated that the moment I found such happiness was at the moment where my life was falling part. Literally.