LOVE BETWEEN US

Chapter 78

I did something bad.

Very bad.

I opened my eyes to a very unfamiliar room, just then the memories of yesterday came rushing back to me.

Oh no!

Grayson and I had too much whiskey shots and ended up getting drunk.

I remember excusing myself to the bathroom and ended up getting lost and going to his bedroom instead.

Not long after I entered,he also came in.

We were both drunk and started talking nonsense, things got heated between us,we couldn't keep our hands to ourselves and we ended up having sex.

Yes we fucked.

I can't believe I let this happen. I became weak for him again, something I tried so hard to stop.

He is truly the only one who can bring me to my knees.

I grabbed his shirt from the floor and wore it. I begun gathering my things from the floor to leave.

I was about leaving after taking all my stuffs when the door opened and he entered holding a tray.

He stopped his movement when he saw me standing there tensed.

"Oh you are awake. I brought you breakfast and some advil for the hang over"he says behaving as if there isn't an elephant in the room to address.

Well two can play this game.

"I am leaving. Thanks for the breakfast but I don't need it"I tell him and begin to walk away but he stopped me.

"I am sorry okay. I should have controlled myself more. But that doesn't mean I regret it,I would do it again if I had the chance"he tells softly

"Well I regret it. This was a mistake and it is never going to happen again. Infact I am going call off the contract, then you can go back to wherever you came from. You shouldn't have come here in the first place, everything was better without you in it"I angry snap at him.

It is now or never. We need to have a closure.

"When are you going to stop pretending you are okay.It is okay to show your weakness. I know I hurt you but it was for my children. They needed a peaceful environment to grow without their mother and it was my duty to give them that. I promised Bryanna to be the best father to them so they never shed a tear and I was going to keep that promise. You would have done the same thing if you were in my shoes. I would do anything for children if it means not being with the one I love. They always come first,I would have been there for our son if I knew he was alive. I know no amount of apology will bring him back but I am sorry, very, very sorry. Please let me be here for you,let me help you grieve"he pleads going on his tears.

The tears I have kept for so long,the anger,the hatred,the resentment,all came rushing back through my tears.

"I begged you Grayson,I pleaded for you to let me by your side. Funny how the tables have turned. I wanted nothing more than to be the woman who helped you back on feet. I wanted to be by your side when you mourned Bryanna,to be the shoulder you cried on every evening before you go to bed. But I guess I wasn't enough was I. I have never been enough for any man,they all end up leaving. I thought you were different,I gave up all my morals and dignity so I can be with you.." I sniffed softly before continuing.

"I thought you loved me, your actions said so,but I guess it was just my imagination, even after you left,I was hoping you'd come back and be with me but turns out I was just being plain stupid. I went to war with my mum just to be a married man but you let me down,you broke me first and for that I hate you" I spit with venom.

"Flynn hurt me but at least he took the blame but you sat there and made me take all the blame but I didn't care because I knew I'll end up with you, again I was just stupid. When my son died a part of me died with him,I wanted revenge,I hated men,you made me hate men. But I saw a bright light in all this,I began to live up to my potentials,to what I was good for,a fucking sex toy",I chuckle humourlessly and he bow down his head with a clenched fist.

"I have slept with almost every man in the city, alot I can't even count. What did your daughter call me again? Oh you even called me the same name,oh..a whore,a slut. So I lived up to my name,I became the whore you wanted me to be. So tell me Grayson do you still want to be with this whore,the woman you've turned me into?"I asked.

The tears couldn't stop coming,shit! I hate being weak Infront of him.

"I don't care about your past Jane. I only care about your future,our future together. The past is in the past, your past doesn't define you. I love you and no amount of your past can change that. Please Jane,let me love you,let me with you,let us be together and have a family together. I love you"he says through clenched teeth

"You don't get it do you?"I say turning my head to side.

"I just don't hate you Grayson,I loathe you,I resent you. I wish I never met you, you broke me into a tiny piece and to can't put me back together. There is no future for us,and there never will be. Like you said we can't be together in this life time, maybe another"I yell at him.

"I am sorry, please don't give up on us. You are grieving and I am willing to wait. There is still hope for us. I love you Jane"he cries, tears of his own flowing.

"There is no hope for us. You can't mend piece of glasses together to a whole. I despise you"I spit at him and run out of the room.

I feel like something has been lifted off my shoulders but there is still anger.

As I descend down the staircase,I bump into something more like someone.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"Annalise venomously says

"I really don't have time for this Anna"I snap at her.

"Oh I see you have successfully found your way back to my dad's bed. I thought you had some dignity left in you,guess I was wrong. You are still the slut you are",she smiles and I grabbed hold of her arms tightly sinking my nails into her skin.

"You listen here you little twat. I won't tolerate insults from you anymore. I can very dangerous when angered so don't tempt me. Grow up and stop being a brat and nuisance to everyone. As a matter of fact I see a lot me inside you,so better watch how you speak to me Anna. Or you wouldn't like me when I become your stepmom"I tell her in a extremely low chilly voice.

Her eyes widen at my last statement and she whimpers.

I let go of her arms and gave her a fake smile before walking away.

Once I got to my car, out of anger I called Mark.

"Miss Jones,is everything okay"he says as soon as he answered.

"I need someone to talk to Dr. Ballard. Are you free?"I asked and sniffed softly.

"Sure. You can come to my office. I'll be free in an hour time"he softly says.

"Okay, I'll you soon"I whisper and bit me lips before ending my call.

A smirk made it way to my lips.

Time to have fun.

If I can't be happy. No one can.