It's easier to act happy than be happy. That might just be me. I've used acting as if it was oxygen. I can't go without it. Does that make me a bad person? Just because my reaction isn't always truthful, doesn't mean I cannot be trusted. I just have to hide who I am to be normal. I have to be normal to stand out in this world. If I wasn't normal, i'd blend in. No one is normal, they say. What is normality? Why are we drawn so oppositely from it? Why question the truth when you can act out a whole new one? There's no wrong answer when you pretend. It's an open world for open minded and tightly observed people to listen. Improve is key. Never messing up is a basic trait. Don't repeat the same phrase over again. You'll fall into a deep hole, clawing your way out helplessly. Make eye contact, but gaze off oftenly. Don't pause to think, just speak. Speak with confidence. Don't show too little or too much emotion. Don't act sly, don't have an attitude. Act as if you are a prisoner, because that's what this life has come to. Hiding the truth to protect your sanity. If we don't hide the truth and just stay quiet, we stand out more. Look it's that girl who shows her emotion way too much. She's hiding something. But if we were to show our emotion, we blend in with the rest. She talks about her emotions, I do too. She's normal like the rest of us. I hate that I wish to go back to a time where standing out wasn't normal. Where I didn't have to pretend to be happy. Pretend to like their clothes, voice, attitude. Pretend to not care about their cruel words and memories. But even if I could see that world, I just can't stop. I can't stop being normal.
